I Will Look After You
by myblackkitten
Summary: Milton gets hurt in a bullying incident and must rely on Jerry to put him back together. But will love blossom in a broken place?
1. Chapter 1

"Great Practice you guys." I said as I began to push the baby grand piano back into the band closet. Sidney put his arm around my shoulder after shouldering his upright Bass. We walked into the hallway.

"Wasn't it though? It feels so good to get back to the roots." He said and I shook my head at him.

"It really is, are you going-" I was pushed into a locker and my breath left me.

"Milton, are you okay?" Sidney asked, trying to help me to my feet.

"Get out of here Nerd." Flint yelled and Sidney looked up at him.

"No."

"Go!" He yelled, pushing Sidney down. He landed on his bass and scampered up before he could get hit again. He scrambled down the hallway.

"Oh look, your little boyfriend just ran out on you and you're all alone." Flint said, pushing me back against the locker.

"He's not my boyfriend." I bit back and he rolled his eyes.

"Come on Nerd, I know what you are." He said and I took a deep breath.

"You're delusional Flint. Now, leave me alone." I said, trying to push past him. He threw me back against the locker and punched me in the stomach.

"You're a little faggot, and you stole that competition from me." He said, grabbing me by my hair.

"Are you still mad about that? It's been three months. Come on." I said and he punched me in the mouth.

"You see, when I get done with you, I'll make sure you never sing another song again." He punched me in the mouth again.

"And you never play another fucking note." He grabbed my hand and shoved it into the locker.

I struggled against him as I heard him open a locker door.

"What are you doing?" I asked and he shoved my hand to the edge of the locker before slamming the door hard. I screamed out and he did it again.

"Stop! Please Stop." I screamed out and he shut the door again on my hand.

"Please." I whined, feeling saliva collect in my throat.

He slammed me against the locker again and reeled his fist back. I closed my eyes, drawing my body closer to myself. I was not ready for that hit.

The hit never came and I slid down onto my butt before looking up.

"Don't fuckin' touch him. Not fuckin ever!" I heard Jerry yell as he kicked him in the stomach. Flint curved into himself and Jerry grabbed his hair and slammed his head into the floor until his eyes slipped into his head.

"Jerry! Stop!" I yelled and he let go of Flint before looking over at me.

"Shit, are you okay?" He asked, rushing over to me.

"M-my hand." I said, holding my shaking hand up to him. My knuckles were purple and bloody.

"Shit." He swore and I looked back to see Principal Funderburk.

"What is going on in here?" He asked before looking down at Flint.

"Martinez, do you know how much trouble you're in?" Funderburk asked and he looked back at me.

"He hurt Milton." He said simply, looking down at my hand.

I took a deep breath to even out my gasping. My hand hurt so much.

"Look, suspend me later, Milton's hand is probably broken and we've got to get him to the nurse." He said, wiping away a tear that mixed with blood.

I sat on my bed, my hand wrapped in a cast as I stared down at my phone.

"Hello?" I heard Kim say into the phone.

"Hey, it's Milton. Are you busy?" I asked, pushing my good hand through my hair.

"Of course not honey, what's wrong? Are you crying?" She asked and I wiped at my tears futilely.

"Yes." I whispered.

"Hold on." She said before I heard rustling.

"Alright I'm back. I had to go to another room. What's wrong?" She asked and I wiped my eyes.

"I got into a fight today." I said.

"You got into a fight or someone beat you up?" She asked.

"Someone beat me up." I answered back, ashamed.

"What did they do? Who was it?" She asked.

"They broke my hand Kim. Like bad. Like I can't train anymore and I can't play." I whispered and she swore.

"I swear the god I'm going to kill Frank." She said and I found myself shaking my head even though I knew she couldn't see it.

"It wasn't Frank. It was Flint. From the Gutter Rats. Frank would never be this cruel." I said picking at my bedspread.

"Why?" She asked. I could hear her anger bubbling in her throat.

"Because he lost battle of the bands to a faggot." I spat out and she shushed me harshly.

"Don't say that. Don't ever say that word. You're not a faggot. When did you come out?" She asked and I swallowed.

"I didn't. This is why I told you I couldn't." I said and she hissed.

"If I were there, no one would touch you."

"He cornered me when no one was there. If Jerry hadn't have shown up, I'd be even more messed up." I said into the phone.

"Jerry saved you?" She asked and I tucked my legs under me.

"He almost killed him. He was so mad, and he wouldn't leave until I got treatment." I said and she made a noise.

"Aww Milty…" She said softly and I scoffed.

"Yeah right, he doesn't want me. He was just taking care of me. I mean, we've been best friends for seven years. Of course he was going to fight for me." I said and I could hear her huff.

"Whatever you say. Maybe he likes you. I mean Jerry's a great guy, but he wouldn't kill anyone over a 'friend'. But from my understanding he was about to kill this kid for you Milton. He obviously cares about you." She said.

"Yeah, cares enough to drive me back into the arms of Julia. Cares enough to make out with Grace at Matt's Party." I spat back.

"He cared enough to try to make you happy. And I said that he cares about you. Not that he's smart." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, I don't even want to talk about it. I just want to lay down and start this whole day over. I'm going to have to go it all alone tomorrow. Jerry got suspended for the rest of the week. Funderburk said he's lucky nothing was too wrong with Flint. Apparently he would've gotten jail time." I said, flopping back onto my bed gingerly.

"Dang, it was that bad?" She asked and I stared up at my ceiling.

"Yeah." I whispered before taking a deep breath.

"I miss you so much." I whispered.

"I miss you too Milty." She breathed back and I sighed.

"How's the Dojo? How's everyone." She asked. I wasn't stupid. She was really asking how Jack was doing. She'd never admit it, but she had never gotten over Jack.

"Rudy sold the Dojo and bought a new one in the mall complex and Phil now has a bowling Alley. Rudy's doing really good. He's looking into adopting Sam. And Jack's a sensei at the new Dojo, he's there so often he never has time to hang out with girls. Also his hair is super long. Like Dave Grohl status." I said and she giggled.

"Yeah, he even wears it in a Ponytail." I said and I could hear her click in disgust.

"And how's Milton?" She asked softly.

"Hopelessly and pathetically head over heels in love with Jerry Martinez and missing his best friend every second of the day." I said softly and she chuckled.

"I'll be visiting soon Milty. And if you two aren't together by the time my plane lands." She threatened emptily.

"Then I guess I'll have to take whatever you give me." I said and she chuckled.

"I always knew you were a bottom!" She cackled into the phone and I scowled.

"I am not."

"Milton, honey?" I looked up to see my mother standing at the door. She was wringing her hands nervously.  
"I've got to go, Kimmy. I love you." I said and she said it back before hanging up.

"Hey mom." I said softly and she sat on the edge of my bed.

"How'd you feel?" She asked and I shrugged. My hand was still numb from the anesthesia but I knew it was only going to hurt worse.

"I'm okay right now." I said and she stroked my hair softly.

"That's good. I'm so sorry this happened." She said and I shrugged.

"I'm kind of tired." I said and she nodded.

"Alright, you don't have to go to school tomorrow. If you don't want to." She said and I shook my head.

"I'll be fine." I said and she sighed before leaving the room.


	2. Chapter 2

I grabbed all the homework that I had managed to scrounge up from his teachers before going to Jerry's house. It'd be nice to not come back to school with a heavy load. Especially since it was my fault that he was suspended in the first place. I took a deep breath before summoning the courage to knock on his door. I hated that my heart was pounding erratically against my ribs.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Jerry asked and I looked up at my fist that was poised to knock on the door.

"I uh, I came to bring you your homework." I said, wiping my broken hand against the side of my jeans.

"Ew. You couldn't have brought snacks?" He asked and I looked down.

"I can go-"

"Come in Milt." He said before pulling me into the house.

"We're going upstairs." I heard Jerry yell and I waved over to his mother who was sitting in front of a television set, a Spanish telenovela playing.

"Hola Milton." His mother yelled and I nodded at her.

"Hola Mrs. Martinez." I said back awkwardly and Jerry rolled his eyes.

"Come on Milt. We've got homework to do." He said before pulling me upstairs.

"Thank god you're here. I'm about to go crazy. All I've been doing is sitting here bored out of my mind watching telenovela's with Mamì." He said flopping back onto his bed.

"Which one?" I asked, sitting next to his sprawled body carefully.

"La Patrona, it's not bad, but god, If I have to hear someone else cry…" He looked over at me before sitting up.

"Does your hand hurt?" He asked and I shrugged.

"The doctor gave me some medication. I don't really feel it." I said looking down at my hand. Jerry grabbed it and flipped it so that my palm was down.

"I'm sorry that jerk even thought about hurting you." He said and I felt my face redden. I looked down and he tipped my chin up.

"He got your mouth pretty bad." He said softly and I shook my head.

"It's just a split lip. I only needed a couple of stitches." I said and he tsked.

"It looks like a tooth went through." He said, his thumb slipping over my mouth delicately before pulling back.

"Uh, are you hungry? I'm sure Mamì will make us something." He said, standing up quickly.

"Uh, no, I'm fine. I can't eat anyway." I said and he sighed.

"We should get to that homework. You don't want to be behind when you get back." I said and he nodded before sitting back down beside me.

"Milton honey, are you staying for dinner?" His mother asked as she stood at the door.  
"Where's Papì?" Jerry asked.

"He's on his way home." She said and I looked over at Jerry. His face was set sternly.

"Sofia, I'm home." I heard his father say before I heard steps on the stairs.

"Oh, Hello Milton." His father said and I waved tentatively at him.

"Well, I guess I see why you almost put a kid in the hospital." He said sarcastically and Jerry shot his mother a look.

"Are you staying for dinner?" His mother asked again and I shook my head.

"I actually have to get home. But thanks for the invite. Really, it was really nice. I'll bring you your homework again tomorrow, alright?" I asked and he nodded before waving at me. I bounded down the stairs, cradling my hurt hand. I could hear Jerry arguing with his father in Spanish. I took a deep breath and shut the door quietly before walking home.

"Hey, you've been gone all day." My father said as I walked into the door.

"Yeah, I went to take Jerry his homework." I said nonchalantly and he nodded.

"How's he doing?" My father asked and I shrugged.

"He's fine. Bored but fine." I said and he nodded.

"That's fine. You know, I'm so thankful that he was there." My dad said and I rolled my eyes.

"Please, I already had mom crying, I don't need you offering him a congressional medal." I said and he smirked.

"I don't have the power to reward congressional medals." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I'm going to bed." I said and my mom stepped into the room.

"Are you not going to eat dinner?" She asked and I shook my head.

"No, I just want to sleep." I said and she nodded.

"Alright, if you get hungry, I'll leave you some food in the microwave." She said and I nodded as I made my way upstairs.

I showered quickly, already tired of the plastic bag I had to keep around my hand before going to lay down.

"Milton!" I looked up to see Jerry at my locker.

"Hey!" I said and he hugged me before patting me on the back.

"It's so good to see you." I said after breaking away from him, trying to hide the smile on my face.

"Isn't it though?" He said and I rolled my eyes.

"You're so full of yourself." I said and he smirked, leaning back against the locker.

"You wouldn't have me any other way." He said and I blushed.

"You're an idiot." I said, before adjusting my backpack straps.

"Have you seen Jack?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Nope. I was grounded all weekend." He said and I nodded.

The fight probably.

The bell rang and I looked up.

"I've got to get to class. I'll see you later." I said and he nodded.

"Yeah, I'll see you at lunch." He said and I nodded before heading to my Calculus class.

I stared up at the board, distracted. I thumped my broken hand against the desk, the thick sound of the plaster hitting the wood keeping me awake. I couldn't pay attention if my life depended it on.

I shook my head and looked down at my notes, I couldn't focus at all.

"Jerry's back." I heard a girl whisper behind me and I sat up a little straighter, trying to eavesdrop on their conversation.  
"Yeah, I know. Can you believe that he gave flint like a double concussion?" Another girl whispered back.

"I know right. I wish I had a man like him." A third girl whispered.

"No way. He's like a psychopath. He practically tried to kill Flint. Over Milton." The first girl whispered.

"No way. You don't think… Jerry's a queer do you?" the second girl asked and I heard a snort.

"Not what I heard from Kathy." The first girl said and I clenched my fist.

"What did she say?" The third girl whispered.

"Nothing that your ears can take. Let's just say, he's really good at rolling his R's."

The bell rang and I stood up quickly.

They were disgusting and I really didn't need to hear reconfirmation that Jerry was undoubtedly straight and undoubtedly not into me.

"Hey Milt… What's wrong?" Jerry asked, his face sinking from a grin to a worried grimace.

"Nothing."

"Is it your hand?" He asked, grabbing my hand and looking over it.

"What are you doing here?" I asked and he scratched the back of his neck, pulling his hand away quickly.

"I-uh- I was going to walk you to class." He said and I looked down.

"I'm okay, I promise. I can walk myself to class." I said softly.

"Okay… alright, see you later." He said and I walked away.

I took a deep breath as I looked up to see the Gutter Rats outside of my classroom.

I sighed before ducking my head and walking into the classroom inconspicuously. I made eye contact with Flint and he sneered up at me before looking up the hallway. He turned away from the classroom, his cronies following him.


	3. Chapter 3

"Alright, run!" I heard the coach yell and I sighed. I was stuck on the bench.

He blew his whistle and I watched as the boys began to line up and run across the gym.

Jerry's group was last.

I tried to keep my eyes off of him, chewing on my thumbnail to distract myself. He was sweaty, his hair falling in his face as he jogged across the gym. I wiped my face with my collar; it was seriously hot in this gym.

I heard a loud smack and my head snapped up. Sidney was sitting on the ground.

"Sorry man, didn't see you there." Jerry said, as coach helped him up. Sidney's face burned red as he went to the back of the line.

Coach blew the final whistle and I stood up.

"Wait for me alright?" Jerry asked, wiping his face on the bottom of his shirt. I felt my mouth dry out and I nodded.

He was back five minutes later, his backpack hanging off of his shoulder by a strap.

"Ready?" He asked and I nodded before making my way to the cafeteria. Jerry sat down beside of me and I opened my bagged lunch, offering him half of my sandwich.

"Hey guys!" I looked up to see Jack, his hair not in that ridiculous ponytail.

"Hey Jack." I said and jack straddled a seat in front of me.

"Hey milt, how's your hand doing?" He asked and I shrugged into my sandwich.

The bruises on my face were slowly fading.

"Jerry, the school is buzzing about you man. You're scarier than I am." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"That's not hard to believe Farrah." I said and he flipped me off.

"Nice one Milton." Jerry said, high fiving me.

"Like I was saying, they're really talking. I heard a couple of girls say something about taming the wild beast." Jack said with a wink and I stared down at my chips, trying not to screw up my face.

"Oh." Jerry said and I cleared my throat.

"I talked to Kim the other day." I said quickly before looking up.

"Oh really? How's she doing?" Jack asked and I shrugged.

"She's doing good. Says she misses us. She said she'll be home soon." I said and Jack nodded.

"That's cool." He said, trying to seem nonchalant.

Their love story was exasperating sometimes.

"So… does she have any new friends?" Jack asked and I picked up a chip, I wasn't even sure if I could eat it, just getting back to eating foods that were more on the solid side than applesauce and soup.

"Apparently all the boys love her over there. They all love blondes." I said mischievously and Jack's jaw set.

"Well, that's very good for her I guess." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Jerry, you're being quiet." I said and he looked up at me.

"huh?" He asked and I smirked.

"Zoning out is what gets you into trouble." I said and he huffed.

"That's not the only thing that gets me in trouble." He mumbled.

"What?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Nothing." He said before stealing one of my chips. I pushed him and he grabbed me from behind quickly, pinning my hands against my chest before grabbing a chip.

"Get out of my food!" I said, squirming against him and Jack stole a chip too.

It was times like these I missed the sophistication of having girl friends.

Jack ruffled my hair and Jerry smacked his hand away.

I hadn't noticed just how bruised his knuckles were.

"Jesus Jerry, did you hit a brick wall?" I asked and he blushed.

"Flints head is harder than it seems." He said before pulling away.

I sighed and shook my head slightly, trying to stop my heart from pounding at the thought of Jerry being wrapped around me.

I laid on my bed, my books spread around me. I should be doing my homework, but I didn't feel like it. I didn't feel like doing anything but staring at the ceiling.

"Milton honey?" My mother stood at my door, knocking slightly.

"yes?" I asked, sitting up and she smoothed over the bottom of my bedspread. That was usually her sign that she wanted to sit down, but didn't know how to ask.

"You can sit." I said softly and she nodded before sitting beside of me.

"We never really talked about how you got hurt." She said and I shrugged.

"I got beat up. It happens." I said and she sighed.

"Honey, you realize that there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect exactly how you are." She said and I eyed her suspiciously.

"What are you talking about?" I asked and she smoothed out her dress.

"I'm talking about whatever you want to talk about sweetie." She said and I shook my head.

"We're not having this talk, whatever you think this talk is." I said and she sighed.

"Alright Milton. I just want you to know that we love you very much and we want you to be comfortable enough to know that you can tell us anything. We just want you to be happy." She said and I sighed.

"Mom, my hand's starting to hurt." I said and she stood up alarmed.

"Do you need some medicine? I can get you something." She said.

"I just need some peace and quiet." I said and her face tightened.

"Oh, okay sweetie. Have a good nap." She said and I nodded as she backed out of the room.

"My mom just tried to have the 'we love you no matter what and we want you to come out to us' talk." I spoke into my receiver and all could hear was Kim's cackling and a thud as she fell off of her bed.

"I hate you." I hissed as she continued to laugh.

"Jerry, could you stay after?" Mr. Kingsford said and I grabbed my backpack, unsure of whether I should stay and wait for him.

"Alright Martinez, you've really messed up this time." Mr. Kingsford began and I watched how Jerry had to restrain himself from rolling his eyes.  
"Okay." He said and Kingsford shook his head.

"Jerry, this is serious, that little fight you got into, well it's going to ruin your high school career. You're going to fail this class because you missed my midterm and that accounts for thirty percent of your grade. The only way you'd be able to you pass is if you got an A on my final, which is highly unlikely and getting an A on every quiz, test, and class work grade. Considering your previous work, you'd better get ready to see me next year." He said and I sighed.

"I'll tutor him." I spoke up and Kingsford looked over as if he'd forgotten I was in the room the entire time.

"What?" He asked.

"I'll tutor him. He'll pass that final." I said and Kingsford laughed but nodded.

"Whatever Milton, it'll be a total waste of time, Trying to teach this one is like shouting at a brick wall." Mr. Kingsford said.  
"I'm right here." Jerry said, exasperation in his voice.  
"I'm aware. Alright, well, I guess you can leave now." Mr. Kingsford said and Jerry grabbed his backpack, storming out of the classroom. I followed after him and stopped him in an empty stairwell.  
"Are you okay?" I asked, resting my hand lightly on his shoulder and they sagged.

"I'm sorry. I'm just a little pissed." He said, closing his eyes before taking a deep breath.  
"It's okay. Kingsford is a-"

"Douchebag. A fucking prick? Check." He said, his jaw set.

"I was going to say an overweight bully who peaked in high school and is trying to relive his glory years." I said and Jerry shook his head.

"Look Jer, we're going to be fine. I'm going to tutor you and prove that you've got this. You're not an idiot." I said and he sighed.

"Aren't I?" He asked and I shook my head.

"Heck no. You're amazing." I blushed before looking down.

"Yeah?" He asked and I nodded.  
"Yeah." I whispered and he wrapped his hands around me.

I laid my head on his shoulder, taking a deep breath. He smelled so good.

I stepped away quickly when I realized that I was enjoying the hug a little more than I should if you know what I mean.

Jerry smirked at me but didn't say a word.

"We should uh… we should get going. Do you wanna study at my house?" I said and he nodded before putting his arm around my shoulder.

"Jerry's here!" I yelled as I opened the door.

"Oh, hi Jerry." My mother said as she came out of the kitchen.  
"Hi Mrs. Krupnick." Jerry said with a wave and I grabbed Jerry's shirt, pulling him upstairs.

"Alright, let's get started with Kingsford. What war are you guys on?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I don't know." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Really Jerry? Alright, what did you guys talk about before the midterm?" I asked and he shrugged.

"Couldn't tell you." He said and I sighed.

"What's the name of the class?" I asked and he laid back on my bed.

"I don't recall." He said and I flopped back beside of him.

"You're harder than I anticipated." I said and he snorted. I blushed and stumbled over my words.

"I mean, you're making this harder than I anticipated." I said and he laughed.

"Not any better." He said and I groaned.

"And that noise, yep, made it worse." He said and I sat up.

"You're disgusting. Now, get up, we have work to do." I said and he snorted again.

"I swear Jerry!" I said, smacking his shoulder.

"Let's take a nap first, maybe it'll clear my head." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Jerry, you're not sleeping in my bed. Now let's go. We've got to study." I said and he folded his hands behind his head.

"But, we could sleep. Come on Milton. Let's sleep." He said, wiggling his eyebrows at me. I sighed and he grabbed my waist, pulling me backwards onto the bed. I yelped and he pulled me closer.

"See, sleep." He said before closing his eyes.

I could feel my heart pounding in my chest.

"You have to close your eyes to sleep." He said, opening one eye to peep at me.

"That's not true. Some people sleep with their eyes closed." I said.

"Yeah, but you don't. Now, close your eyes." He said before brushing his hands over my eyelids. My eyes closed automatically, my face flushing. His hands trailed over my face.

"I swear it gets worse every time I see you." He said softly.

"Thanks Jer, like I needed to know I'm getting uglier by the second." I hissed.

"What?" he asked and I opened my eyes.

"You said it gets worse every time you see me. Sorry my face is so hideous." I said and his face snapped in realization.

"The bruises… The bruises get worse. Not your face." He said and I shrugged.

"I like being face down in bed." I said and he snorted.

"Jesus Milt. There are some things I don't need to know."

"You are so gross." I said, pushing his shoulder.

"You're the one saying it. Not me." He said and I rolled my eyes before closing them.

I opened my eyes to find my head on Jerry's chest. My feet were almost hanging off the bed. His shirt had raised a little, exposing his hip bones and a trail of hair that led down into his boxers.

"What's up?" Jerry asked as he opened his eyes, looking down at me. I crossed my legs before pulling away from him.

"Nothing." I said and he laughed but ruffled my hair.

"I bet." He sat up and I sat up, pulling my knees to my chest.

"So, I guess we better study. What time is it?" He asked, grabbing a notebook.

"It's uh- five thirty. Yeah, we should study." I said and he nodded.

"Alright, I'm going to pee. I'll be back." He said and I nodded.

He walked out of the room and I rolled over onto my bed, burying my head in my pillow. I was mortified.

"alright, let's start." He said, jumping onto my bed, almost landing on me.

"Be careful." I hissed, pulling my broken hand from under him. The pain quickly turned me off and Jerry jumped, grabbing my hand.

"Sorry milt. Did I hurt you?" He asked and I shook my head.

"No, let's get to studying. Did you think of what war you guys were talking about?" I asked nodded.

"Yeah- uh, I'm pretty sure we're at the Mexican American war." He said and I nodded before grabbing my textbook and flipping to page 394.

"Turn to page 394." I said and he chuckled.

"Werewolves?" He said with a terrible British accent and I pushed him.

"Stop joking around." I said and he leaned his shoulder into mine as he flipped to the page.


	4. Chapter 4

I stood in the mirror after Jerry left, staring down at my naked torso. I had an ugly purple bruise that covered a large amount of my torso. I sighed and shifted my torso to get a good look at my back. I had bruises that spanned the length of my back from where Flint had shoved me hard against the lockers. I pressed my good hand into one and hissed before turning back around and peering into the mirror.

My face was really bad, the bruises turning the darkest purple. They'd turn yellow soon, which was disgusting. I spread my lip opened to look at the rigged scar that ran across the inside of my lip. I could see where the stitches had been placed. I sighed before turning away from the mirror. I had to take a shower.

I bolted in bed, my heart pounding in my ears as a sickening feeling crept up my spine. I had a dream about Flint slamming the locker doors on my hands. I looked down at my cast covered hand, a dull ache radiating through it and sighed running my right hand through my hair. I took a deep breath before flopping back onto my bed, cradling my left hand to my chest. I buried my bruised face into my pillow, wincing slightly at the pain, but I could smell Jerry's scent still lingering. I smiled to myself as I took a deep breath before closing my eyes.

"Hey Milt!" I looked up to see Jerry standing at my locker.

"Hey Jerry." I said, as I walked up to him.

"How's your hand?" He asked and I looked down at it.

"Still broken." I said and he grabbed my backpack.

"What are you doing?" I asked and he looked down before looking back at me.

"I figured, I should help you put your books in your um locker." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I'm not completely useless. I can do it." I said, motioning for my backpack. He pulled it back from me and I stepped into his space.

"Jerry, give me back my backpack." I said and he pulled it farther away until I was hovering over him.

"I'm still taller than you Jerry." I said, reaching over him to grab his backpack. We were almost chest to chest.

"Uh, just… let me do this for you?" He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Give me my backpack." I said and he stepped closer so our chest touched.

"Make me." He said with a smirk on his face.

Someone cleared their throat and I stepped back from him quickly.

"You idiots are blocking my locker. Move." Jack said and I rolled my eyes, before stepping from his locker.

Jerry opened my locker and began to empty my books before slinging it around his shoulders.

'Come on Milt." He said and I walked after him.

"You don't have to carry my backpack Jerry." I said and he nodded.

"Yes I do." He said looking straight ahead.

"No, you really don't." I said, crossing my arms.

"Yes, I really do." He said and I groaned.

"Why?" I asked and he stopped.

"Here's your first period. See you after class." He said, handing me my backpack. I nodded and he took a deep breath before nodding.

He walked away from me, running his hands through his hair and I turned and walked into the classroom.

When the bell rang he was standing at my class door, holding his hand out. I lifted my hand to grab his when I realized he wanted my backpack. I clenched my fist before dropping my hand quickly and handing him my backpack.

It was the same routine for the rest of the day. He'd meet me at my classroom, hold out his hand and take my backpack. It was a bit ridiculous considering he had his own backpack.

Jerry and I sat on my bed, his legs spread out across my bed while I sat with my knees tucked to my chest. Jerry reached out and brushed his hands across my leg and I felt myself blush.

"They're like little chicken legs." He said and I kicked at him.

"Well I'm sorry I don't have those behemoth tarantula limbs." I said and he smirked.

"Well, everything on me is pretty big." He said, leaning back on his elbows. My face flushed and I looked down at my blanket.

"Yeah, like those satellites on the side of your head." I snuffed and he tackled me, pinning me down.

I felt the wind get knocked out of me as he carefully maneuvered us so that my left arm was safe out of reach.

"What'd you say, string bean?" He said with an eyebrow raised and my heart sky rocketed in my chest.

"You heard me, dumbo." I said back and he grabbed my good arm, pinning it over my head.

"Take it back." He said with a smirk and I shook my head. I could feel my entire body turning red.

"Make me." I said and he smirked, raising both eyebrows.

"Make you huh?" He said before leaning closer to my face. His fist clenched on my wrist and I felt myself turn even redder.

My Skype tone began to sound and he sat back onto his knees slowly. I sat up on my elbows.

"I kinda have to get that." I said and he rolled over off of me, collapsing on his back, his knees up. He grabbed a pillow and plopped it over his face and I rolled my eyes as I clicked 'answer'.

"Hey Milty… Is that Jerry?" She asked and the boy in question reached his hand up and waved at her without removing the pillow from his face.

"Why are you so red? And breathing heavy?" She asked as I sat in my computer chair, tucking my knees to my chest. Her face pulled into a smirk and I glared at her.

"Jerry and I were wrestling." I said and she nodded.

"uh-huh. So, I just got your text, but I see you're busy. So I'll call you back later. Have fun. Bye Jer!" She said and I rolled my eyes.

"You're ridiculous and I hate you thoroughly." I hissed into the camera. She just raised an eyebrow at me before ending the call.

"Well that was short." I said before turning back to Jerry. He turned his head towards me, his face neutral.

"I'm hurt she didn't even talk to me." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"She said hi, and bye. Those are words. She talked to you." I said and he threw the pillow at me. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked down at my wrist. It was still red.

"Jesus Jerry." I said, pushing him and he grabbed my hand.

"What?" He asked and I moved around my wrist.

"I think you bruised my wrist, you brute." I said and he swallowed.

"Dude, I'm so sorry." He said and I shrugged.

"It's cool." I said and he sat up, scooting back to the top of the bed.

"So, anyway, Mexican- American war, Texas revolution: Remember The Alamo." He said and I nodded.

"So you remember what led up to the war." I said and he shrugged.

"It's a movie isn't it?" He said and I rolled my eyes before picking up my book. I looked up to see him staring at me.

"What?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Nothing. I just..." He looked back at his book. "What page are we on?" He asked and I shook my head.

"403." I said and he nodded. I looked down again.

"Bye Jer!" I yelled as he got into his mother's car. He waved at me before she pulled away.

I went back upstairs and turned on my Skype.

"You know, if you don't want people to interrupt you, you turn your Skype to away, or at least do not disturb before you start getting busy." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up. No one was getting busy." I said with a blush and she snorted.

"It sure looked like it." She said and I grabbed the lid of my laptop.

"I'll close the lid and go to bed, I swear I will." I said and she laughed.

"I was just kidding Milty. It's not my fault Jerry had a boner." She said and my mouth dropped opened.

"He did not." I said.

"oh yeah he did." She said and I shook my head.

"You're ridiculous Kim. I told you, he is not attracted to me at all." I said and she raised her eyebrow.

"Whatever you say Milton. I just know that whenever Jack got one, he always covered his face and lifted his knees, which Jerry did."

"No, I do not need to think about Jack with a boner. Please never even say that." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"You are such a baby. Anyway, so your text." She said and I shook my head slightly, trying to clear it.

"Oh yeah, it's been really weird at school lately. Jerry never leaves me alone. He's at every one of my classrooms when the bell rings."

"Aww." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"There is nothing to aww about, so stop awwing."

"You two are cute, it's like the call me maybe video." She said and I glared at her.

"No, it's like the nothing, because it is nothing. Anyway. It's like he doesn't trust me to go anywhere by myself. Like I'm going to throw myself into a pit or something. It's like he thinks I'm weak now. Which, I know I am but he doesn't have to throw it in my face." I said leaning my chin on my knees.

"Come on Milt. He doesn't think you're weak. You're not weak. You're one of the strongest people I know. Jerry cares about you, even if you don't think it's romantic, he's known you for a long time, you guys are the bestest of friends. He knows how strong you are." She said and I sighed.

"But I'm not strong." I whispered before clearing my throat.

"I've got to go." I said and she shook her head.

"I love you Milt. Try not to strain your wrist." She said.  
"Love you to- why would I strain my wrist?" I asked and she smirked,

"I hate you." I said and she flipped her hair.

"You love me. Good night sweetie." She said and I hung up on her.

'Goodnight.' I texted her quickly, before dropping onto my bed.

I didn't end up straining my wrist.

Turns out that some things just don't easily transfer onto the other hand.


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up, frustration already clouding my mind.

I had woken up late and part of me just wanted to lie in bed for the rest of the day. My hand throbbed, like a constant reminder that I was weak. I groaned and popped the top of my medicine before taking some. I grabbed a quick shower and made my way downstairs.

"I thought you weren't going to school." My mother said and I ran a hand through my hair.  
"No, just overslept. Can we get going?" I asked and she nodded before grabbing her keys and taking me to school.

I trudged to my locker where Jerry was waiting for me.

"Hey… are you okay?" He asked and I leaned my head against the locker.

"Yeah, just irritated." I mumbled into the locker next to mine before reaching up to open my locker. Jerry grabbed my hand and I looked over at him.

"What are you doing?" I asked and he flushed before looking over my hand.

"I bruised you." He said and I wrung my hand away from his.

"Yeah, it happens. I'm fragile like a baby bird." I said before dumping my math book into my locker.

He grabbed my backpack and I glared at him, but let him take it anyway.

"You're going to be late for class." He said and I shrugged.

"You'll be later." I said and he shrugged.

"If I actually came to class on time I'm sure Mr. Henderson would have a heart attack." He said and I rolled my eyes.

We walked to my first period, my hands crossed over my chest.

"Here's your bag." He said and I nodded before taking it. I walked into my classroom and he left.

I laid my head down, my face contorted in pain. My stomach was in knots and I felt like I was going to throw up any minute.

"Milton, are you okay?" Mr. Rosen asked and I nodded before wrapping my arms around my stomach.

The bell rang and I sighed.

"Milt, are you okay?" I looked over to see Jerry kneeling beside of my desk.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I said, sitting straight up in my chair. My stomach panged again and I groaned.

"What's wrong?" He asked and I shook my head.

"It's nothing." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong." He said and I looked over at him.

"Maybe I don't need your help." I said, grabbing my backpack and pushing out of the classroom. The bell rang and I groaned as my head began to pound.

Why was this my day?

"Milton!" I heard jerry yell and I froze. The hallway had cleared out.

"What?" I asked with a whine as I turned to face him.

"What the fuck is up with you?" He yelled before he blew a breath, knotting his hands in his hair.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked softly and I sighed.

"No, you're absolutely perfect." I said before blushing and looking down. He took a couple of steps towards me and I sighed. He wrapped his arms around me and I collapsed in his arms.

"Well then, why are you acting like this?" He asked and I buried my head in his neck.

"Because I have the worst stomach ache in my life, my head is pounding and today has been a terrible day." I said. _And because I'm so weak_

"Did you eat this morning?" He asked and I rolled my eyes.

"No dad, I didn't." I said and he held his hands up.

"I don't need to know your kinks Milton." He said and I smacked his arm.

"Stop being gross." I said before groaning again.

He put his hand on my stomach before digging into my backpack and pulling out a sandwich.

"What are you doing?" I asked and he handed me the sandwich.

"I really don't want to eat that right now. What part of my stomach is killing me don't you understand?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"Milton, you may know everything there is to be known, but you have no common sense. If you take pain pills on an empty stomach, it will wreck you. Now, eat the sandwich." He said and I grumbled but unwrapped the food wrapper and took a bite. I swallowed it down and groaned.

"I really don't think I can do it." I said and he rubbed my back.

"Yes you can, just eat the sandwich." He said and I sighed before finishing the sandwich.

"Come on." He said and I sighed.

"Where are we going?" I asked and he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"We're going to go make you feel better." He said and I sighed. He led us to the cafeteria.

"Hey Marge! Can I get some milk?" He yelled to the lunch lady.

"Why, hey Jerry, skipping class again?" She asked and he shrugged.

"Milton has a stomach ache." He said and she tsked in sympathy before handing him a carton.

"I really hope you don't puke." He said before handing me the carton. I sipped the beverage slowly until it was all down. Soon my stomach stopped hurting completely.

"Why do you know that?" I asked and he shrugged.

"When my mom broke her ankle they prescribed her some medication that made her stomach hurt when she didn't eat." He said and I nodded.

"Do you want to get out of here?" He asked.

"What?" I asked.

"Do you want to skip class?" He asked and I shrugged.

"I've never skipped… what if we get in trouble?" I asked and he grabbed my broken hand.

"Milt, look at this hand. There is literally nothing you can do in class. You'll be fine. You even came to school after… look, you need a break. Come on." He said, he stood up and I followed dumbly. He was still holding my hand.

I laid on the sand, leaning my head into his side.

"I'm going to fry." I complained and he reached into his backpack, throwing me some sunscreen.

"Why do you have this in your backpack?" I asked and he looked over at me.

"So I can jerk off in the boys' bathroom during classes." He said and I blushed.

"I'm just kidding. I had planned on us going to the beach… I just didn't think it was going to be during class." He said and I closed my eyes.

"Don't let me fall asleep. I'm serious, the sun makes me tired." I said with a yawn and he trailed his hand up my arm.

"Stop, that tickles." I whispered, my eyes closed. His head pressed into the top of mine and I could feel my heart rocket in my chest.

"Stay awake with me." He said and I opened my eyes as he pulled me closer to him.

"Yeah, okay." I said, sitting up straighter.

We had every intention of going back to school so Jerry wouldn't miss Kingsford's class.

We didn't, opting to stay on the beach.

Jerry grabbed me as I ran from him and picked me up, swinging me around.

"Let me go." I said, wriggling around in his grasp. He loosened his grasp on me and I turned in his arms.

He let me go further and I felt my feet touch the sand. He didn't let me go, just kept me in his grasp. I bet he could feel my heart beating fast in my chest.

He dropped his arms and I turned away from him.

"It's getting pretty chilly." I said, and he pulled me to his backpack, throwing his jacket at me. I flailed as I caught it and he chuckled softly. I pulled the jacket on, pulling at the sleeves to adjust in the jacket.

"We should go soon." I said and he sighed.

"Yeah I guess. We still have to study." He said before pulling his backpack and mine from the sand. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders before walking us back to my house.

"I'm home!" I yelled and my dad nodded at me from his study.

"Come on." I said, before heading upstairs. He dropped my backpack on the floor before plopping onto my bed. I shut the door behind him before crawling onto my bed. I laid beside of him, my eyes drooping.

"Is this your medicine?" He asked and I nodded. He fingered the bottle before putting it back down on the dresser.

"You know how much money you could get for this stuff?" He asked and I punched his chest lightly.

"I heard this stuff makes it hard to get it up. Can you get it up?" He asked and I blushed, burying my head in my blanket.

My mom must have made my bed this morning.

"trust me Jerry. I don't have a problem in that area." I said before looking over at him. He looked down at me, his arm laying under my head.

"But dude, I don't know how you can survive it. Your 'me-time' hand is out of commission. I bet you can't even do it can you?" he asked and I closed my eyes.

"Can we talk about something else?" I asked and he awed.

"Poor milly, can't even 'relieve tension.'" He said and I groaned.

"Please, any other topic would suffice at this point. As a matter of fact. I bet the Mexican war would be a great topic." I said, turning to face him.

"You really can't, can you?" he asked, his hand trailing over my bruised wrist absently.

"Jerry please." He blushed before clearing his throat.

"Can we just sleep?" I asked.

"I thought we were going to study." He said and I shrugged.

"I'm tired." And mortified, and a little turned on.

"Okay, yeah. Let's sleep." He said and I closed my eyes.

The sun had tired me out and I wanted nothing more than to curl into his side and sleep.

So I did.

I opened my eyes to see Jerry still lying beside of me. I snuggled closer to his warmth, pulling a blanket over us. I laid my head on his forearm and closed my eyes.

"Milton Dear?" My mother asked softly as she knocked on my door.

I opened my eyes slowly and she smiled.

"Oh honey." My mom breathed and I glared at her.

"Don't say anything. It's not like that." I said and she smiled softly.

"I came to ask if your guest were staying for dinner. But I guess you skipped straight to des-"

"Mom, for the love of God, please get out." I said and she nodded, her arms held up in mock surrender.

She giggled as she left and I shook my head before laying back down beside of Jerry. I felt self-conscious as I felt myself harden. I tried to pull my lower body away from Jerry and he wrapped his hand around my waist before pulling me closer, keeping me pinned next to him.

"It's okay." He whispered and I blushed harder. His thigh was trapped between my legs and I swallowed as I resisted the urge to rut up against his leg. I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead against his chest as I tried to get my arousal under control.

"Hey." He whispered, his eyes slipping opened and I looked up at him, my face red and my breathing unsteady.

"Hey." I whispered and his hand fell to my cheek.

"Did you burn?" He asked, his thumb swiping over my cheekbone.

"No- uh, it's just really hot in here." I said and he smiled.

"Yeah, okay."

"So uh… my mom asked if you wanted to stay for dinner." I said and he untangled his legs from mine before sitting up and stretching his back.

"Nah, I have to get back soon, you know how my dad is." He said.

"You could stay the night." I said and he shook his head.

"I don't think that's a good idea." He said and I felt my stomach drop. He felt it and now he thought I was a freak.

"Don't panic Milly. I still love you." He cleared his throat.

"You know how my parents feel about me staying out on school nights." He said and I nodded, blushing.

"I'm going to call my parents."

"I'll take you home." I said and he nodded.

"Sure." He said before grabbing his backpack. I drove him home and he looked back at me before getting out of the car. He leaned in through the window.

"I'll see you tomorrow alright? Make sure you eat something before you take your medicine next time." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Yes sir." I said and he cuffed my jaw.

"Don't be a loser." He said before looking back at his house.

"ponerse en la puta casa, ahora!" His father yelled from the door. (Get in the fucking house now)

"Lo harè, Dejamè." He said before leaning back into the window. (i will, leave me alone)

"What was that about?" I asked and he shrugged.

"He's just being a dick. I'll see you in the morning. Good night." He said and I smiled before looking down.

"Night, Jerry."

"Ahora Jerry!" His father yelled and he rolled his eyes before pushing away from the car. (Now, Jerry)

I drove back home before eating dinner.


	6. Chapter 6

I walked up to my locker, handing Jerry my backpack. He began to unload my books before shouldering my backpack.

"What's wrong?" I asked and he leaned his head against the locker.

"I'm tired." He said and I leaned into him.

"Stayed up all night." He groaned and I laughed.

"Doing what? Sampling the secret sauce?" I said with a smirk and he looked over at me.

"You know you want a taste." He said and I pushed him. He stuck his tongue out at me and I blushed.

"You're disgusting." I said and he laughed.

"Hey, you said it. And no, me and my dad got into it last night." He said and I bit my lip.

"Did he hit you?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"I wish he would." He said before pushing off from the locker.

"Ready to go to class?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Not really."

"What? Milton David Krupnick doesn't want to go to class?" He said and I pushed him with my shoulder.

"Guess you're rubbing off on me." I said.

"You have no idea." He said with a smirk as he walked away from me.

I hurried after him.

"It's Friday." Jerry said as we walked out of the gym. He had his arm wrapped around my shoulders and I was tucked into his side. He had rolled up his sleeves so that his arms were exposed.

"Yep." I said distractedly and he looked up at me.

It was crazy how much taller I was than Jerry.

"You should stay the night." I said and he shrugged.

"Maybe." He said before walking into the cafeteria. I sat down before opening my lunchbox. Jerry took my sandwich out as usual and split it down the middle.

Jack came up with his tray, sitting down across from us.

"Thanks for ditching me yesterday." Jack said and I rolled my eyes.

"You ditch us all the time." I said and he shook his head.

"I do not." He said and Jerry snorted.

"You ditched me two weeks ago to get conditioner." Jerry said and Jack flipped his hair off his shoulder.

"Hey, it was a sale on Paul Mitchell. This" He pointed to his hair "Does not happen by itself." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever Drama queen." I said and he flipped his hair again.

"It's okay to be jealous, Milton." He said and I snorted.

"Of what?" I said.

"My beauty." He said and Jerry wrapped his arms around me.

"Milly's ten times more beautiful than you, Jack." Jerry said and I pushed him.

"Shut up." I said with a blush and he knocked his shoulder into mine.

I sat at the head of my bed, reading out of Jerry's text book to him as he sat at the bottom.

"Are you staying the night?" I asked and he looked up at me, his hands behind his head.

"I can't." He said, rolling over and propping himself up on his elbow.  
"Why not?" I asked, closing the book gently.

"I just can't." He said and I sighed.

"Oh." I said and he sat up.

"Please don't be mad at me." He said.

"What's her name?" I asked.

"What?" He asked.

"What's the girls name that you're ditching me to go see?" I asked.

"I'm not going to see a girl. I'm just grounded. I promise." He said.

"For what?" I asked.

"Talking back." He said and I nodded.

"That sucks." I said and he shrugged.

"It's whatever." He said before laying back on my bed.

"So, more about the Great Compromise of 1850." He said and I began to read from his book again.

My Skype began to ring and I sighed before getting off of my bed and answering the call.

"Hey Kimmy." I said and she raised her eyebrow.

"Wow, I didn't expect you to answer. Jerry in the bathroom?" She asked and I looked around.

"No, why?" I said.

"Because I don't see him in your room. Is he hiding?" She asked and I rolled my eyes.

"He's not here." I said.

"Really? It's a Friday night, why are you not together?" She asked.

"Because, contrary to your belief, we are not dating, besides, he's grounded." I said, scratching at a dark mark on my desk.

"Oh, that sucks. So what are you up to?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Lying in the dark and moping, so you know, a typical Friday night for me." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"Well, why don't you call him?" She said and I ran my hand through my hair.

"What would I say 'I know that I saw you literally an hour ago, but I miss you because I am head over heels in love with you because I don't get the boundaries of a friendship." I said sarcastically.

"Or a simple hey would suffice." She said

"Wouldn't that be weird though?" I asked and she sighed.

"Jesus Milton, you two are still friends, you've texted him before, This is Jerry Martinez, not Aaron Samuels, it's not that hard." She said.

"Jerry's way hotter than Aaron Samuels." I offered.

"No, no he's really not." She said.

"Yeah he is. Aaron Samuels is just so, white." I said with a shudder.

"That's not what you said the first time we watched Mean Girls. Who was it that crushed my dreams after telling me he's gay?" She asked and I rolled my eyes.

"I've evolved." I said.

"You're living La Vida Loca over there huh? Speaking of, I have to ask you a question." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"What could you possibly want to know?" I asked sarcastically.

"Who'd top? Who'd bottom?"

"Regina George is the ultimate top." I said.

"Not Regina and Aaron, you and Jerry."

I blushed and choked on my saliva.

"What?" I said.

"Who would top? Who would bottom. Because from my understanding, it's normally the taller one who tops, but there's no way you'd top." She said.

"I could top." I said, my face red.

"No, no you really couldn't. Besides, there's no way on God's green Earth that Jerry's a bottom." She said and I blushed.

"Can you please not." I said.

"Well come on, look at him. He has dominant top written all over him. Could you imagine bending him over a table? No, But, I bet you could imagine him bending you over-"

"Please, shut up Kim." I said.

"Well, you know it's true."

"Kim, I don't know what you read in your spare time, but I really suggest you lay off the gay porn." I said and she snorted.

"You're ridiculous." She said.

"And you're disgusting. Now, I'm going to go shower and wash off all of your vile implications."

"Is that what they're calling it these days?"

"Oh my God, Good night Kimberly." I said.

"Good Night Milton." She said with a wink and I hung up on her.

'you just couldn't wait huh?' she messaged me.

'I hate you.' I sent back.

'Do not, you love me'

'so much hate' I messaged her back before going to the bathroom to shower.

I curled up on the couch with a bowl of popcorn beside me and a Lifetime movie playing. My mother was sitting in her chair.

Normally Kim would be sitting beside me for Friday movie night.

There was a knock at the door and I sighed,

"I'll get it mom." I said before stretching my back.

I unfolded myself from the couch and sighed, running my hands through my hair as I made my way to the door.

"Hel- Hey." I said as Jerry stood at my door.

"I thought you were grounded?" I asked and he rubbed his palms together.

"My mom gave me some Leeway. Is this a bad time?" He asked and I looked down at my pajama clad legs.

"Uh, no. Come in." He was wearing a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt.

I was wearing Pajamas with little ducks on them.

There are no words.

I ushered him in and he waved at my mom.

"Hi Mrs. Krupnick." He said and she smiled.

"Hey, we were just watching a movie, you wanna watch?" She asked and he shrugged.

"Why not?" He said before plopping onto the couch. I curled up next to the arm rest. He wrapped his hand around the back of the couch and I scooted into his side.

Halfway through the movie my phone vibrated and I sighed before opening the text.

"Who would top? Who would bottom?" Kim texted me and I blushed.

'no one, because no one is having sex.' I sent back.

'I don't know, I've been thinking, maybe Jerry would bottom.'

'oh my god, this is not a good time Kim.' I sent back.

'I mean, have you seen him move, homeboy knows how to move his hips…'

'Kim, please stop this'

'but, he's definitely a top.'

"Who's a top?" Jerry whispered in my ear and I flushed.

"Nobody, it's nothing, just kim being an idiot. We should watch the movie." I said tucking my phone under me.

"Come on, let me see." He said, reaching over me to grab my phone, I was pushed onto my back as he reached under my butt to get my phone.

"Well, I guess Movie night's over." My mom said and I looked over at her. I pushed jerry until he was sitting up.

She began to grab her afghan and her bowl of popcorn.

"Let me help with that Mrs. Krupnick." Jerry said and she shook her head.

"No need, I'll just be in my room." She said before winking at me and I groaned.

She was the worst.

She left the room and I kicked at Jerry.

"What are you doing?" He asked,

"Kicking you off my couch." I said and he rolled his eyes before leaning back over me.

"So, you never answered my question. Who's a top?" He asked and I swallowed.

"Uh, Dean Winchester. Definitely." I said with a blush and he rolled his eyes.

"I bet." He said and I pushed him off of me. I got off of the couch.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Going to my room." I said as I began to roll my blanket over my arm

"Wait, I want to know why all of a sudden she wants to take a hike." He said and I rolled his eyes.

"I'm just going to guess to kill him, but then his mom is going to find them and kick her butt." I said.

"Oh, you've seen it?" He asked and I rolled his eyes again.

"it's a lifetime movie, that's all that ever happens." I said and he pushed me. I stumbled into the table and he caught me.

"You okay?" He asked and I pulled away from him.

"I'm fine. Come on, let's go upstairs." I said and he grabbed the bowl of popcorn before following me upstairs.

He flopped on my bed and I climbed on after him.

"Why must you flop?" I asked, pinching his side and he scooted over a bit, allowing space for me to sit.

"You bed's the perfect height for flopping. Your bed was made to be flopped into, not sat down 'upon'." He said and I kicked him.

"I'm pretty sure my bed was not made for all of your flopping. You're going to end up breaking it." I said and he smirked.

"Are you afraid I'll break your bed springs?" He asked and I punched him.

"Why are all of my friends disgusting?" I said and he smirked.

"You bring out the naughty in people." He said and I blushed.

"Oh do I?" I asked, trying to be seductive as I sprawled out beside of him. I propped myself up on my elbow, my head resting in my palm, and my hurt hand on my hip as I tried to look sexy.

"Oh yeah, especially with those ducks on your pants, Muy caliente." He purred and I blushed. He pushed my hand down and I fell onto my face.  
"Shut up. I'm hot." I said and he smirked.

"So much, I can barely keep my hands off of you." He said and I punched him.

"Don't be a jerk." I said before rolling onto my back. He sat up and leaned back on his palms.

"Do you want to do something?" He asked and I sat up.

"Like what?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I don't want to go to bed right now, it's only ten." He said and I shrugged.

"We could play some video games." I suggested and he nodded.

"Yeah sure." He said and I got off the bed and popped a game into my game console.

"What's with the wacky pants?" He asked as I settled back on the bed.

"Before Kim moved away, my mom, kim and I would watch Lifetime movies in crazy pajamas." I said as I began to set up the game.

"And let me guess, eat pints of ice cream and talk about boys?" He said and I punched him in the chest.

"Shut up." I said before the screen turned to play mode.

I laid down, my eyes tired.

"I've had enough Zombie slaying for a night. I'm tired." I said, laying the controller on the side table. He tossed it onto the floor and I tried to glare at him.  
"I'll pick it up tomorrow." He offered and I rolled my eyes before standing up.

"No, you'll forget it and kick it under the bed, then I'll be the one on my hands and knees trying to find it." I said and he hooked his hand around my waist, pulling me down on the bed.

"Please, just stop talking." He said and I furrowed my brows before realizing what I'd said.

I blushed and rolled off of Jerry. He slung his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I could feel his breath on the back of my neck and I clamped my eyes shut. I really shouldn't get myself worked up; I had no way to relieve it.

I finally settled in to my pillow and sighed as I felt sleep begin to overtake me.

"By the way, I'm a top." I heard Jerry whisper and my eyes popped opened. I heard him chuckle before his breathing evened out and he drifted off.

I hated him so much.

I awoke with a start, my heart thumping in my throat to the sound a locker door slamming shut.

"Milt?" Jerry asked and I looked over at him, bewildered.

"Wha- what's going on?" I asked and he scooted closer to me.

"You, you were having a bad dream. You were whimpering." He said and I took a deep breath before closing my eyes. I tried to regulate my breathing, to keep the fear at bay.

"You're safe, I'm right here." Jerry whispered.

"Milton, are you okay?" He asked and I tried to nod.

He placed his hand on my cheek softly before rubbing his thumb in circles. I felt my breath get caught in my throat and my chest seemed to constrict. I closed my eyes as tears began to fall out of my eyes.

"What's wrong milt? Why are you crying?" He asked and I put my head in his chest as the tears began to pour faster.

"Honey, what's wrong?" he asked and I sucked in a gasp.

"I just… you… thank you." I whispered and he tilted my face up. I tried to blink back the tears in my eyes, I wanted to see his face.

He leaned into me and I closed my eyes. I could feel his breath ghost across my face and my heart leapt in my chest.

"We should, get back to bed." He whispered before pulling away.

His hand slipped from my chin and he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Uh- uh yeah, you're right." I said, my throat feeling even more constricted. I wanted to cry even more.

I swallowed hard and laid back down.

"What was your dream about?" He asked and I sighed.

"Zombies." I answered softly, my voice cracking.

"Don't worry Milt, I'd protect you." He whispered and I sighed.

"Good night Jerry." I said and he nodded.

"Good night Milton." He whispered back.

He shifted back so our bodies weren't touching and I sighed into my pillow.


	7. Chapter 7

Hey! New chapter!. Sorry about the delay, my birthday was this weekend and this week is finals so i'm a little spread thin! But here you go. Thanks for reading and please review.

* * *

He left early the next morning and I pulled my books out, trying to distract myself.

When that no longer worked, I sat down at my piano bench. I played with the keys a little, trying to find a rhythm with my right hand. It was hard to try and play without my left hand. It all felt clumsy and bumbling. I groaned and dropped onto my bed, burying my head in my pillow before I felt my phone buzz under me.

'Skype?'

I sat up and dropped onto my desk chair before calling her.

"What's wrong?" She asked as my screen popped up.

"Nothing, why?" I said and she raised her eyebrow at me.

"Don't try and lie to me Milton, you're terrible at it. Besides, it's written all over your face. It's a very expressive face." She said and I groaned before plopping my head into my hand.

"Jerry came over last night." I said.

"and…" she asked, her voice suggestive.

"and nothing happened. He doesn't want me." I said with a sigh before looking up at her.

"What happened?" She asked and I sighed.

"I had a nightmare and Jerry tried to comfort me. We almost kissed but he backed off and scooted away from me and he will barely touch me. He barely looked at me this morning and I screwed everything and he hates me because I'm so disgusting." I whispered.

"Milton, don't be ridiculous. I'm sure that's-"

"Please Kim, it has to be me. It's always me." I whispered.

"I just… What am I supposed to do now?" I asked, my voice cracking as tears began to prick my eyes.

"Milton, it's not you, you're great. Maybe you're misconstruing it. And it's definitely not you. It will never be you, I promise." She said and I sighed.

"I can't lose him because of this silly crush. I rather have him in my life forever than to you know fornicate with him once, or to lose him altogether.

"Or, you could fuck him and have him forever. Look Milton. He likes you, I know he does, hell, half of Seaford does, and those who think he doesn't, well, those are the idiot girls who are infatuated with the unattainable" She said.

"Oh, so me." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"Just talk to him. God, boys are so complicated." She said.

"I can't. I'll just… suck it up or something."

"Oh honey." She whispered and I sighed before turning in my chair.

"I've got to go. I'll see you later Kimmy." I said and she waved before I hung up.

"Knock Knock." I heard my mother say and my door slid opened. I wiped my eyes subtly and she sat on my bed.

"Hey." I said and she smiled.

"Hey honey." She said and I looked up to see my dad standing at my door.

"uh, what's going on?" I asked and she smiled sweetly.

"Your father and I wanted to talk to you about something important." She said and I sighed.

"What could you possibly want to talk about?" I asked.

"Well, Honey, we just want you to know that we love you so much and that we will always love you, no matter what." She said before looking back at my father.

"We know how important it is for you to know that you have our support, and so we want you to know that you can tell us anything." He said and I sighed.

"We also want you to know that we know how hard it is being a teenager, and we don't expect you to restrain from _certain_ behaviors. However, we want you to be smart about it." She said and my father cleared his throat.

"Exactly, just because you can't get pregnant does not mean that protection can be foregone. Safety is much more important than his pleasure, and it's up to you to know your limits…" My father said, looking very uncomfortable.

"Please… please do not do this to me." I said.

"Honey, you're a smart kid, but we want to make sure you are informed." My mother said before putting a box on my bed.

"So, we got you some pamphlets. Just, don't be afraid to ask us for anything. Your safety is more important than embarrassment." She said and I dumped the box out.

"How to make anal sex pleasurable for you and your partner… No glove, no love… how to properly prep your partner… Oh my god." I said, dropping my head in my hands. On the top of the pile of pamphlets was a box of condoms and a bottle of lube.

"Safe sex is the best sex." My mother said and I groaned.

"Alright, I'm gay, there you go. I'm gay yes, but this… this is a little over the top and ridiculous." I said and my father sat down beside me.

"Milton, that is completely okay with us. We love you. We really do. And we want you to be informed." My father said.

"I appreciate the gesture, really I do, but I'm pretty sure none of this will be necessary. Like ever." I said.

"Honey, you never know when it'll happen. If you're in the heat of the moment, I don't want you to make the wrong choice when you could choose safety." My mother said and I groaned.

"Gah." I exclaimed as I flopped onto my back.

"Please leave." I said and I pointed to the door.

"Just, read the pamphlets alright?" My mom said and I groaned.

"Alright, I'll read them. Just leave." I said and my father got up.

"We love you Milton." My dad said and I nodded.

"Love you too." I said as I stared up at the ceiling.

"Hey Milton." Jerry said as he walked up to me. It was right before our gym class.

"Hey," I said, pulling my gym shorts up.

"What's wrong?" He asked and I pulled my sweater vest off before starting on the buttons.

"Here, let me." He said before unbuttoning the top button of my shirt. He followed it down until his hand was trailing across my waist band. I blushed and he trailed his hand over my chest.

"Damn, these are bad huh?" He said, his fingers ghosting over my bruised torso. I snatched my gym shirt up and threw it on. He pulled it down over my head.

"Where were you this morning?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I slept in." He said and I nodded.

"Are you still coming over to study?" I asked and he nodded.

"Of course. Wouldn't miss hanging out with you for the world." He said and I sighed.

"We've got to go to gym." I said and he nodded.

"Give me a minute." He said before pulling off his pants. I watched as he shimmied into some shorts that made his calves look really strong. He peeled his shirt off and I felt my mouth go dry as he pulled on a sleeveless shirt.

"Come on." He said, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

I ducked my head, but let him lead me to the gym.

God, there was no way I would get over Jerry.

He put his backpack on my floor before laying down on my bed. I rolled my eyes, before crawling into my desk chair, my knees tucked into my chest.

"What are you doing?" He asked and I grabbed my ankles.

"We should really focus on studying today." I said and he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Yeah, but why aren't you on the bed?" He asked and I sighed.

"I think that it would be best if I sat at my desk today." I said and he sat up, crossing his legs.

"Yeah, I guess." He said before pulling his backpack closer to him. He leaned over off of the bed to look through his backpack and I watched as his shirt rose.

He sighed and leaned up.

"Milton, please come sit next to me on the bed." He said and I smoothed my hand over my desk.

"I'm quite fine at my desk… So what page were we on?" I asked as I began to flip through the history book.

"Milt." He said and I tried to keep my eyes on my book, I really did.

I was going to stay at my desk. I was not going to get sucked into Jerry's hopeless vortex of love.

I was a dirty rotten liar.

He was standing in front of me, holding his hand out. I grabbed it and he dragged me onto the bed so that we were sitting together.

"Alright, so, let's talk about the beginning of the civil war." I said , flipping opened his book. He closed it and slid it away from me.

"I… I wanna talk about something else." He said and I nodded.

"Sure, do you wanna go back over the Great Compromise?" I asked.

"No."

"Okay, then Mexican American War? I've been going very fast this week, I can understand you-"

He put his hand on my mouth and took a deep breath. He leaned into me and I watched as he closed his eyes and shook his head. He was shaking.

"Jerry…" I breathed and he pressed his lips to mine. My heart raced in my chest as I felt his hand find my chin. He stroked my chin with his thumb and I closed my eyes.

He pulled back, looking down at the bed.  
"What was that?" I asked and he cleared his throat.

"I- was that okay?" He asked and I swallowed.

"Why?" I asked and he ran his hands through his hair.

"Isn't it obvious Milton? I kind of like you." He said and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Me? Jerry, you can't like me. Look at me. Besides, you're straight."

Please stop talking.

"I really wish people didn't tell me who I was and what I liked. I like you alright. I do. I think you're beautiful." He said and I shook my head.

"You like girls." I said, bewildered.

"Yeah, and I like you. What's the big deal? Why does it matter?" He said, pulling away from me.

Seriously Milton, you're ruining everything. Keep your mouth shut.

"Because you like me… Why do you like me? I'm just me."

"Because I think you're attractive, and funny, and smart and nice and other adjectives that would fit in my mamì's telenovela's. I just like you… I wasn't reading this wrong was I? I did didn't I. Of course you wouldn't like me. Really Jerry, really?" He said and I grabbed his hands.

"Of course I like you. I've liked you since seventh grade." I said and he smiled up at me.

"Good." He said and I smiled back.

"Good." I said back, my hand trailing up to play with his ear.

"Bueno" He said before leaning back in to kiss me.

I never wanted this to stop.


	8. Chapter 8

"I'll call you tonight." Jerry said with a grin as he stood at the door. I looked back at my parents, who looked like they were trying to give off the appearance that they were not eavesdropping, but I knew that as soon as Jerry left they'd descend like wolves with their 'we're not going to be intrusive' intrusiveness.

My parents were the epitome of polite snooping.

"Alright, see you later." I said, looking down at my sneakers.

"Later." He said and I bit my lip before looking up at him. He just nodded behind me before leaving.

"Good study sesh?" my mom asked and I rolled my eyes before running upstairs and grabbing my phone.

My Skype began to ring and I answered it.

"Hey Milty!" Kim said with a wave.

"What happened?" She asked and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"What do you mean?" I asked and she rolled her eyes before raising an eyebrow.

"You're smiling…. Like, a fucking sunflower." She said and I looked down at my desk.

"I'm happy." I said and she squealed.

"It happened didn't it. You and Jerry kissed didn't you!" She said and I blushed.

"yeah." I said shyly.

"Aww. So is he your boyfriend now?" She asked and I furrowed my eyebrows.

Was he?

"We didn't exactly talk about that." I said and scowled at me.

"What do you mean you didn't talk about it? What the hell were you guys doing?" She asked.

"Well…" I began and she slapped her face.

"Ew… just ew." She said.

"We didn't do anything like that. We just sort of made out the whole time. There was really no time for us to talk." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"Well, DTR boy!" She said and I looked at her blankly.

"Define the Relationship. Seriously, it's like you're allergic to pop culture." She said, flipping her hair.

"That's not true, I know what Mean Girls is, and that's all that is important and I've seen The Notebook."

"Yeah, Pop culture for 2004, it's been ten years Milty, update your hard drive." She said and I rolled my eyes at her.

My phone began to vibrate and I looked back at it before looking at her.

"Go ahead and talk to him. God, was I this annoying about Jack?" She asked and I raised my eyebrow.

"Shut up." She said before hanging up on me.

I walked into school, my hands trembling. I hoped everything wouldn't be different. I hoped that last night wasn't just a mistake.

"Hey Milt." Jerry said, smiling at me warmly and I blushed.

It was Jerry, him kissing me shouldn't turn me into a giggling school girl every time I saw him.

He was Jerry, the same idiot that I used to spar with, the same idiot that held my hand because he was afraid to fly, the same idiot with an eight pack that I wanted to lick.

Alright… So, I was just going to turn into a giggling girl.

"Hey." I whispered and he rolled his eyes before grabbing my backpack. He grabbed my hand, squeezing it before dropping it.

"Milton, can we talk?" He asked as he laid on my bed. I sat up, picking at my fingernails.

"Uh, yeah…" I said.

Of course, we're kinda dating for twenty hours and he already wants to break up with me.

"Don't look so sad." He said and I nodded.

"You know how I really like you?" He said and I nodded.  
"And you know how we kinda kissed yesterday?" he said and I rolled my eyes.

"No Jerry, I wasn't aware." He punched me in the shoulder before grabbing my hand.

"Don't be so sarcastic. Look… I really like you… I do, and I want you to be… with me." He said, as if he was uncomfortable with the words. I guess, 'be my boyfriend' was a little too uncomfortable for him.

"Yeah and?" I asked.

"And I hate to ask this of you because you don't deserve this… But could we keep this between us? Like, just at school and you know…" He said and I nodded.

"I get it. I'm not Mika or anything. I'm not arm candy material." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"No, that's not it. I just… I don't think I'm ready. I can't… you know."

Come out.

"It's okay… I don't think I'm ready to come out either." I said and he squeezed my hand.

"This doesn't take anything away from us right? Because, I'm not ashamed of you. Hell, I upgraded." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Yep, you got an 11… and you're a seven. Way outta your league." I said, putting my hand on my hip and the other on my head. I winked at him and he pounced on me.

"Yep, way out of my league." He said before kissing me.

"Oh… I already told Kim." I said, pressing my hands into his chest and he sat up, running his hands through his hair.

"Okay, Kim's your best girl friend. That's okay." He said.

"Are you going to tell Jack?" I asked and he shook his head.

"No." He said simply.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Just won't." He said before leaning back down to kiss me.

"Parents? Can I tell my parents? I mean, they basically know." I asked against his lips.

He just kissed me harder.

"What about Albert and Sidney? They're okay with being gay." I said.

"No. No one at school." He said and I pushed him up.

"Why?" I asked and he sat up.

"Because then you'd be out." He said and I nodded.

I loved Sidney and I tolerated Albert, but they couldn't keep a secret if their lives depended on it.

There was a knock on my door and we sprang away from each other.

"Hey honey, just wanted to know if you two wanted any snacks or anything." My mom said and I ran my hands through my hair to smooth it down.

"No thank you mom." I said.

"Ooh so, what are we studying?" She asked and Jerry cleared his throat.

"The secession of the southern states." He said.

I was impressed. We hadn't even opened our books since he got here.

I was a terrible tutor.

"Fun… you two must be studying really hard." She said and I groaned.

"Yeah, I guess. We should get back to that. So yeah." I said and she nodded before winking at me.

"Well, I'll leave you to get back to it. Have fun." She said before leaving the room and I rolled my eyes. She had probably stood outside my door to see what we were doing.

"We should really study now." I said and he nodded before grabbing his book.

In ten minutes the books were discarded at the bottom of my bed.

"Hey, do you wanna hang out tonight?" Jerry asked as he stood at my locker.

"We always hang out." I said and he rolled his eyes before stepping closer.

"No, like, hang out." He said with a smirk.

"Oh like a date." I whispered and he nodded.

"Yeah, sure." I said, my face turning red. He grabbed my hand, playing my finger before pulling away and looking around.

I bit my lip and he punched me in the arm.

"Stop looking at me like that. You make me wanna kiss you." He said and I felt my face redden even more as I felt my grin spread across my face.

"Really?" I asked. Why would he want to kiss _this_.

"Yes really." He said and I looked down. He took a deep breath before grabbing my backpack.

"Come on, we've gotta get to class." He said and I nodded.

I sat on a bench in the dojo, watching as he attacked a sparring dummy. His shirt was clinging to his body with sweat as he kicked it. I tried not to stare, i hated to be like the older ladies who hung out at the dojo to watch the younger guys practice, but now I could see the appeal. I looking down at my knuckles, they were stiff from the cast and I only wanted to wriggle my fingers.

"Don't look so down Milt." Jerry said, wiping his forehead with his shirt.

"Shut up. You're lucky I'm not out there. I'd kick your butt." I said, and he snorted.

"Yeah right string bean." He said, rolling his eyes.

"Oh I could. You know I could." I said and he sauntered over to me, leaning over my body. He braced each hand by my side.

"You can kick my ass?" He asked, and I put my good hand on his chest.

"All day." I said and he pushed my shoulder.

"Don't make me have to handle that ass." He said and I blushed.

A grin spread across his face.

"What makes you think I wouldn't handle your ass?" I said, and his eyebrows shot up. I didn't curse, so it was kind of weird to say one. He looked just as baffled.

"You couldn't handle this ass." He said before pushing away from me. He went back to sparring and I went back to looking at his butt.

I really couldn't handle that.

"See you guys later. Bye Milton." Rudy said as he left the dojo.

"Where are you going?" Jack said as he wiped off his face.

"Sam has a recital. I've gotta be a responsible parent." He said and Jerry rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, you've left Sam alone so much, I would be surprised if you even knew how old he is." Jerry said and Rudy sneered at him.

"He's with the babysitter. Jack, lock up when you get finished alright?" Rudy asked and Jack nodded as he began to push sparring dummies against the wall.

"Got it. Tell the little guy I said good luck." He said and Rudy waved before leaving.

I followed Jerry into the back room so that he could his backpack and duffel bag. He wrapped his arms around my shoulder and I tried to duck around him.

"Gross Jer, you smell terrible." I said and he held his arms up.

"Oh do I?" He asked as he pushed his armpits towards me. I backed into a locker and he boxed me in with his arms. I looked up at him and I couldn't help the blush that began to spread through me.

"Stop that." He said, his hand tracing where my lip was pulled between my teeth.

"Stop what?" I asked.

"Biting your lip. It makes me wanna kiss you." He said and I bit my lip again.

"Then do it." I whispered.

He leaned forward, kissing me and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

His hands fell to my waist and pushed me back into the locker as he stepped closer to me.

"Where'd you guys go?" I heard Jack call and Jerry jumped away from me just as Jack turned the corner.

"What were you two doing back here?" He asked and I took a deep breath, trying to stop my heart from thudding in my chest.

"I-uh- we uh…" I began.

"Just torturing Milton here." Jerry said with ease before lifting his arm.

"God jer." I said as I pushed him away.

"Well I'm about to lock up." Jack said and Jerry nodded.

"I'm going to go shower." Jerry said, pointing towards the showers and Jack nodded.

Was it too early in the relationship to join him?

God, I'm turning into Kim.

"How's your hand?" Jack asked and I sighed. I was so tired of that question.

"About as broken as it was yesterday, maybe a little less." I said and he rolled his eyes, flicking his hair.

And Jack calls me a girl.

"That's good I guess. Uh, so…"

"Kim's fine. And single." I said with an air of annoyance. Honestly, I was not their custody child. They were not going to send messages to each other through me because they're too stubborn to talk to each other for whatever reason.

"I wasn't even going to ask about her, but since you brought her up, do you know when she'll be back?" He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I don't know, in a couple of weeks? The week before prom I think." I said and he nodded.

"That's pretty cool." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Do you think she'd wanna.."

"Don't ask me. Getting me to ask is the number one way to get a no." I said.

"Hey, ready to go?" Jerry asked as he stood at the door, his arms stretched to touch the top of the door.

"Of course." I said, grabbing the door frame easily. He pushed me away and I patted him on the head.

"Don't patronize me." He said.

"Where are you two going?" Jack asked.

"uh- just gonna go hang out." Jerry said and I wrapped my arms around my chest, praying to every god that what I thought was about to happen, wouldn't.

"Oh, cool, it's been a while since all three of us hung out." Jack said.

Please, please please.

"That's not true, we hung out at lunch today." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"it's been a while since we've all hung out o_utside of school_. We should hang tonight." He said.

GAH!

"Uh-" I looked at Jerry who looked just as disappointed as me.

"What is it, a date?" Jack asked.

"No! It's not a date. Just two dudes hanging out… Or I guess three dudes now." Jerry said and I glared at him.

"Cool, let me get my jacket." Jack said before going to the back of the studio.

"Why would you invite him?" I hissed.

"What was I supposed to say?" Jerry asked and I groaned.

"Come on guys, let's go." Jack said, grabbing the keys to the dojo.

I sat beside of Jerry, my hands folded in my lap. This was not how I wanted my first date to go.

But I guess it's kind of poetic justice for wrecking Jack and Kim's first date.

I felt Jerry's arm nudge into my lap and I slapped it away.

"Milt…" I heard him whisper and I tried to keep my eyes on the screen. We had opted out of the romantic movie we were going to see for some Sylvester Stallion monstrosity.

"Come on, don't be mad." He whispered and I looked over at him, frustration showing easily in my face. He grabbed my hand, pulling it on the drink holder before leaning over to my ear.

"I'm sorry; I'll make it up to you. I promise." He whispered, his teeth grazing my earlobe.

Just then a car exploded on the screen, lighting up the theater. He sat back, pulling his face away as if he'd been struck by lightning. I sighed, but let his hand tangle with mine.

"That movie was awesome." Jack said as we exited the theater. Jerry's hand would bump into mine every couple of steps and I wished he'd just grab it.

"I guess." I said and jack reached over, pushing me.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked and Jerry pushed him.

"Don't hit Milton." He said sternly. I blushed and Jack rolled his eyes.

"Sorry bro." He said before linking his arm around me and Jerry's shoulders. He butted between us, and I groaned internally.

"So, I'm starving… who's up for some food?" He asked.

"I should get home." I said, awkwardly and he sighed.

"Well, what about you Jer?" He asked and Jerry shrugged.

"See you later Milton." Jack said, pulling Jerry away.

I walked home, angry and alone.


	9. Chapter 9

I heard knocking on my window and I bolted in bed.

"Milt…" I heard Jerry whisper and I got up, opening the window.

"What do you want?" I asked and he stepped into my room knocking over some papers.

"I'm sorry about that." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"You're always making a mess, nothing different." I said and he shook his head.

"No, just Jack. He's so needy." He said and i smirked.

"Isn't he." I said and he grabbed my hand.

"I brought you some food. Since our date got ruined." He whispered before dragging me onto the bed.

"Wow, how very Troy Bolton of you." I said and he rolled his eyes but pulled out some sandwiches.

"Shut up and take my gesture." He said before handing me a sandwich. I took a bite and he squeezed my hand.

We whispered in the dark until it was getting too late for him to stay.

"Are you going home?" I asked and he rolled onto his side, looking at me.

"I don't want to." He whispered, leaning his forehead on mine.

"Well, then stay." I whispered and he sighed.

"I don't think I can." He whispered and I ran my hands through his hair.

I never really thought I'd actually run my hands through his hair.

"Yes you can." I whispered and he leaned in and kissed me.

"I gotta go." He whispered against my lips before getting out of bed.

I awoke to my mother standing in my door.

"What's going on?" I asked, rubbing at my bleary eyes.

"You were screaming." She said and I ran my hand through my hair.

"Was I?" I asked and she nodded.

"We thought something was wrong." She said and I pulled my blanket off.

"I'm fine." I said and she sighed.

"Are you sure?" She asked softly.

"Yeah. Just a nightmare." I said.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked and I shook my head.

"No, I just want to get ready for school." I said and she raised her eyebrow.

"Milton Dear, it's Saturday." She said and I shook my head.

"Yeah, right, you're right, it's Saturday." I said, looking over at my clock to see that it was six in the morning.

"Honey, maybe you should get back to bed." she said and I shook my head.

"No, I think I'll get up." I said and she sat on the edge of my bed.

"Honey, maybe… maybe you'd be comfortable talking about it with someone else." She said and I raised my eyebrow.

"what do you mean?" I asked.

"Just… Honey, maybe you should think about getting some help dealing with your feelings. It's completely natural to feel the way you do honey." She began and I sighed.

"Is this about the gay thing, mother?" I asked and her eyes widened.

"Not at all. I would never suggest something like that unless I thought you absolutely needed it. I'm talking about your nightmares… maybe you should talk to someone about your incident. You don't seem confident enough to confide in us. So maybe you'd feel better talking to someone without the thought of remorse or emotional ties." She said and I shook my head.

"I don't need counseling. I'm fine." I said and she tsked.

"Alright hon." She said, patting my leg.

"So, what's your plans for today?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Probably just hang out with Jerry." She said.

"Oh…" She said.  
"Mom…" I warned.

"You two are getting mighty close." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"We've always been close." I said and she smirked.

"Well, I just hope that you two have been safe. You've read the pamphlets haven't you?" She asked and I groaned.

"Oh my god, me and Jerry haven't done anything like that yet."

"Yet?" She said and my eyes widened.

"Uh… I meant, like, you know, we haven't done anything, and we won't." I said and she sat closer to me.

"Milton Honey. You don't have to hide anything alright? We are perfectly fine with you and whoever you decide to date." She said and I blushed.

"Not everyone is like you mom." I said.

"Is that why that boy hurt you?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Is that why you are trying to hide your relationship with Jerry from me?" She asked and I looked up at her.

"How-"

"Honestly Milton, you two can't stop looking at each other. Besides, I heard him in your room the other night. Tell him, next time he could just use the door." She said and I blushed.

"He's going to be so mad at me." I said and she put her hand on top of mine.

"Why? You didn't tell me." She said and I sighed.

"I guess."

"Well, I'm going to go back to bed. Love you darling." She said, kissing me on the forehead.

"So, we don't have to hide around my house." I said and Jerry looked at me puzzled.

"What?" He asked.

"My parents know." I whispered.

"What!" He repeated, sitting back on his haunches to look at me.

"I'm sorry." I said.  
"Milton, I thought we agreed it'd be best if they didn't know." He said and I sighed.

"I didn't tell them. They figured it out Mr. I'm-going-to-scale-the-side-of-your-house-at-two-a.m." I said and he put his head in his hands.

"it's not that bad. It just means now they know and we don't have to hide so much. Maybe my mom will stop barging in my room to check on us." I said and he shrugged.

"we could get free reign of the couch. We could snuggle." I goaded, poking his side and he shrugged, trying not to smile.

"That's not that bad."

"And Maybe we can manage to get the house to ourselves." I suggested and he shrugged, a smirk spreading across his face.

"And what exactly do you plan to do if we did get the house to ourselves? What kind of guy do you take me for Mr. Krupnick?" He asked and I grabbed his collar and pressed our lips together. He laid down over me before rolling onto his side.

So we've evolved to kissing laying down.

He slipped his hand under my shirt, his thumb circling my hip and I felt a blush spread against my skin. I wrapped my hands around his neck and tilted my head. He groaned and pulled me closer.

This was definitely good. This was a good time. This was the best time.

And that was my phone ringing.

"Ignore it." He whispered against my lips and I was happy to oblige.

My phone rang again and I picked it up.

"It's Sidney." I whispered and he began to kiss down my neck.

"Ignore it." He whispered and I turned off my phone and he made it back up my mouth.

His phone began to ring and he swore before reaching into his back pocket.

"Ignore it." I said and he shook his head.

"I can't. It could be my dad." He said before looking at his phone.

It was Jack.

"Oh, hey man." He said into the receiver and I flopped down onto my pillows.

I was really starting to hate Jack.

I opened my binder and a slip of paper fell to the ground. I picked it up and looked around cautiously before opening it.

It was a hall pass.

I flipped it over, why would I have a hall pass?

'Meet me in the Library at 11:05' the note read in Jerry's handwriting. I looked at the clock, it was 11:10.

I raised my hand, I wasn't really needed in this class anyway. It was my free period.

They couldn't find an academic class that I was eligible to take and there weren't any electives I could take.

"Can I go to the Library?" I asked Mrs. Mead and she looked up from her book.

"Yeah, of course. I have nothing for you." She said and I nodded before packing up my stuff.

I normally just helped her during her planning period.

"Why aren't you in class?" I asked as I sat down at the table Jerry had been sitting at. He had his feet on the edge of the table as he tipped back in his chair.

"Ms. Rooney sent us to the library to work on our projects for the rest of class." He said with a shrug and I looked around at the deserted library.

"There's no one here." I said plainly and he nodded.

"Yep, everyone left. Why would they stay when half of them have nothing to do and cars?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Because of the integrity of rules?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"Funny." He deadpanned.

"Well, why didn't you leave?" I asked and he smirked.

"I got to work on my project. Besides, you weren't doing anything right now. I wasn't about to pass up the chance to see you." He said and I found myself smiling despite myself.

He leaned across the table and kissed me gently before pulling back and looking around.

"Come on, I need some books." He said and I nodded before getting up from the table. My face was really red.

I followed him into the stacks as he muddled over a sheet of paper.

"Let me see." I said and he handed it to me.

"Easy, these should be back here." I said.

"Glad I have my own library guide." He said, pinching my side and I elbowed him in the side. We walked to the back of the library where the stacks went from hip height to above our heads.

"See, right here." I said and he went to grab one. It was too high for him and I grabbed it.

He looked around and I did the same, we were completely secluded.

He stepped closer to me and I looked down. He was looking down too. He looked up and I rested my forehead against his. He bumped his fingers with mine, before playing with my index finger. He grabbed my waist and pulled me closer until our chests were touching before kissing me. I backed up until my back was against one of the shelves and I could feel his hand rubbing over my hip. I put one of my hands on the back of his head and he tilted his head.

He pulled me in tighter and I couldn't help but roll my head into the kiss.

My head hit the stack and one of the books slammed onto the shelf. We jumped apart, my face painted red. He was breathing hard, but smirking and I wanted nothing more than to be pulled back into those arms.

"We should get back to the table." He whispered and I nodded as he slid his lips over mine. He grabbed my hand and I felt my stomach clench. I dropped into the seat beside of him, our fingers still intertwined.

"So, what did you guys talk about in class, we're caught up right?" I asked as I dropped onto my bed.

"Oh yeah, we're on schedule, I think we might be a little ahead, all we did was take a quiz." He said with a shrug.

"How do you think you did?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I don't know, why don't I check." He leaned into his backpack and pulled out a sheet of paper.

He got a 93.

"It's an A." I said incredulously and he nodded.

"I'm so proud of you." I said and he smiled before sitting back against my headboard.

"Really?" He asked.

"Of course. My boyfriend got an A on a pop quiz." I said and he tilted his head.

"What did you say?" He asked and I blushed.

"I said my boyfriend got an A. Can I not… should I not? You're my boyfriend right?" I asked and he smirked.

"Say it again?" He asked.

"You're my boyfriend. Jerry, what are you-" He pulled me closer to him.

"Say it again."

"You're my boyfriend." I breathed and he smiled softly before pulling me into his lap.

"Again."

"Jerry Martinez is my boyfriend." I said and he kissed me roughly. I straddled his knees, unsure what to do.

He put his hands on my hips and I sighed against his lips. I ran my hands up his chest and one of his hands grabbed my butt before pulling me closer.

I made a noise in the back of my throat and he kissed me harder.

He let his other hand travel under my shirt and I groaned.

Me and Julie never kissed like this.

I felt his tongue trace across my bottom lip and I opened my mouth slightly.

So this was French kissing? Wow, it's a big day for France.

I put my hand under his shirt and he rolled his hips under me.

I could feel this coming to an embarrassing end soon as he gripped my hips and rolled them against his.

"Is this okay?" He murmured against my lips and I nodded, unable to trust my voice.

I whimpered as I felt a heady rush.

"Jer… I'm gonna-"

"Milton- oh sorry guys." I heard my mother say as my door burst open and I groaned as I was thrown from his lap.

I bumped my head off the headboard and landed on the floor.

"Honey, are you okay?" My mother asked and I groaned.

"Mom, please." I said and she shut the door as she left quickly.

"Are you okay?" I heard Jerry ask and I leaned up on my elbows.

"I almost… in front of my mother." I said and he put his head down on his knees before laughing.

I couldn't help but laugh too.

"Come here." He said through his chuckles as he grabbed my hand and pulled me back on the bed.

"When's the last time you've gotten off?" He asked and I shrugged, my face heating up.

"Not since before the incident." I said and his hand dropped to my thigh.

"You know, I can help you out there, if you want me to." He whispered as his hand rubbed circles over my jeans.

I swallowed and nodded. His hand trailed up to the button of my jeans.

"Milton, Dinner!" My mom called and I dropped my head back on my pillow. The world was conspiring against me.


	10. Chapter 10

"Hey guys!" Jack said, dropping in between us at lunch.

"Hey Jack." I said, trying to hide my discontent.

I wasn't doing a good job at it.

"So, what are we doing this weekend?" He asked and I sighed before looking at Jerry pointedly.

"Uh… I'm probably just going to study for my history class. I have a lot of catching up to do." He said and Jack nodded.

"What about you, Milton?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Probably going to stay in." I said and he nodded.

"That's a bummer. We should hang out before then huh? Maybe tomorrow night? I'm free, what about you guys?" He began and I looked back, knowing that I wouldn't even get a good second first date with him, to see Sidney.

I wondered why he called me on Saturday.

I got up and went over to his table.

"Hey Sid. How's classical music club doing?" I asked and he shrugged, looking down into his plate.

"It's fine. Not really functioning without you." He said and I sat down.

"You guys really don't have to stop because I can't play at the moment." I said and he shrugged.

"You brought the cool factor, Milton." He said and I scoffed.

"Hey Milt, let's go." I looked back to see Jerry.

Sidney cleared his throat and stood up abruptly.

"I'm sorry about your arm, Milt. Really. I should have stayed." He said before looking down.

"I've got to go." He said before gathering his paper bag and dumping his trash out.

I went back to Jerry and Jack and Jerry wrapped his hand around my shoulder.

I have no idea why I loved it when he did that.

Jerry and I's second date was ruined when Jack decided that we were all going to hang out.

I swear he knows and he's just being a dick about it.

"Oh my God, I'm going to kill him." I said into Jerry's chest as we laid in my bed.

"What do you expect Milton. He's lonely." Jerry said with a shrug and I looked up at him.

"Well then, he should get a dog or a goldfish or a pet rock." I said and Jerry smoothed down my hair.

"Imagine if I was away from you and Jack and Kim just started ignoring you."

"Kim would never ignore me. I'm her best friend. She literally has no one else but me." I said.

"You're missing the point, alright. Jack's lonely. We're best friends-"

"Untrue, I'm your best friend." I said and he shot me a look.

"_And_ I'm spending all my time holed up in your room." He said.

"Which wouldn't be the case if we could go out somewhere, but we can't because Jack is being so needy." I said and he scoffed.

"He has no one else but Rudy, and Rudy can't hang out and go to movies and get food with him. People would talk. It'd be a scandal." He said and I punched him in the arm.  
"You sound like one of your mom's Telenovela's."

"It's true." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I knew I shouldn't have talked to you about this. I don't want rationality, I want to rant. Gah!" I said and my Skype began to ring.

"Kim!" I said as her face appeared on the screen.

"Oh, Hey Jerry, hey Milton." She said with a smirk and he waved.

"Hey Kim." He said with a nod as I sat back down beside of him.

"You guys are so cute." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, I gotta go, I'll talk to you tonight alright?" He whispered as he checked his phone.

"Alright… talk to you later." I whispered and he leaned down to kiss me before looking at the computer screen.

I grabbed his chin and let our lips touch.

"Ew, gross!" I heard Kim say and Jerry flicked the camera off.

"Bye Jer." I said as we drifted apart. His face was red.

He grabbed my shoulder before leaving my room.

"Aww, you guys are two cute." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up." I said and she sighed.

"What was wrong with Jerry? He seemed… I don't know, uncomfortable." She said.

"Yeah well, that's the first time we've kissed in front of anyone, well besides my mom." I said with a shrug.

"You kissed in front of your mom?" She asked and i shrugged.

"Kinda, she sort of just walked in on us." I said, my face reddening.

"What were you two doing?" She asked and I looked down.

"just, stuff." I said and she gasped.

"Milton David Krupnick."

"Jeez, it wasn't that bad, we just were making out."

"Making out? Or _Making out_?" She asked, making a motion of a hand rubbing all over her body.

"Uh, the second one I guess, I was in his lap, Kim; it was heaven." I said and she laughed.

"Shut up, I'm jealous now. I want someone to debauch me." She said with a pout and I blushed.

"Speaking of that special someone, I'm going to kill Jack. It's done, there's nothing you can do." I said and she sighed.

"Why?" She asked.

"Because he is the worse human being on earth and so far has crashed every date Jerry and I have had. He's a cockblock!" I said and she gasped.

"Did you just say cockblock? Oh my god, what has happened to my little Milty?" She said and I sighed.

"Blue balls happened to me."

"Oh my goodness, my precious ears." She said, holding her hands over her ears as she imitated a southern accent.

"Shut up. I'm serious. I haven't had a date with him."

"Just tell him that it's a date and to step off." She said with a shrug.

"I can't. Jerry said that we couldn't tell Jack." I said and she furrowed her eyebrows.

"Why not?" She asked.

"You know him; he doesn't want to come out yet." I said and she made a noise.

"Don't look at me like that." I said and she raised her hand.

"I'm not looking at you in any kind of way Milty." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Bye Kim." I said and she sighed.

"Bye Milton." She said before hanging up.

I waited at my locker for Jerry, it was the end of the day and he didn't show up at my classroom after my last period.

I sighed and crossed my arms, waiting impatiently. I looked down at my phone to see the message he sent me earlier.

'Got checked out, I'll meet you at your locker after school.' I ran my hand through my hair and pulled my backpack up on my shoulder.

It was weird carrying it; I hadn't carried it in almost four weeks.

My phone buzzed and I looked down at it.

'Come outside' I furrowed my eyebrows but made my way out of the school.

"Why didn't you come get me-"

I looked up to see Jerry sitting in the driver's seat of a black Jeep liberty.

"Where'd you get this car? Did you steal it?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"No I didn't steal it. I bought it." He said.

"Did you?" I asked, my voice lowering to a mutter as I went in to kiss him.

"Hey Milton." Jack said and I groaned before leaning my head against the door frame.

"Jack needed a ride home, then we can head back to your place." He said and I nodded before getting into the back seat.

"Hey milt." Jack said as I leaned forward against Jerry's seat.

"Why are your eyes red?" I asked and he laughed before looking at Jack.

"We christened the jeep." He said and I plucked him aside the head.

"Should you be driving?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"I'm fine now." He said before dropping a giggly Jack off.

"You shouldn't do that." I said as we stopped outside of my house.

"I shouldn't do a lot of things." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"We can christen the jeep ourselves." He said, leaning into the passenger seat. I kissed him and leaned back against the door. His mouth tasted of smoke and artificial vanilla. His hands trailed up my shirt and I wrapped my arms around his neck as I played with the nape of his neck.

His mouth ran over my throat and I bared my neck to him.

Now I see why Julie wanted a guy with a car. There were definitely perks. I pulled my hand away from his hair to go to the bottom of his shirt and he sat back, pulling his shirt over his head.

I'd seen Jerry's abs before, I'd gotten to touch them a couple of times.

But it was nothing like this, knowing I could trail my hands up and down them without repercussion.

He pulled at my shirt and I felt my face redden.

"You really shouldn't, I mean, I'm not-" He pulled my shirt off and stared.

"I know, it's disappointing." I said, grabbing for my shirt and he ran his hand down my chest. My stomach fluttered as his hand trailed over my flat stomach.

"Jesus Milt, you're gorgeous." He said before surging forward and kissing me.

I was definitely okay with this.

His hand grabbed my hips as I ran my hands over his hipbones.

Why was he so buff?

"Do you wanna…?" He whispered, his knees slipping between my legs and I groaned, my head falling back against the wall.

Of course I wanted to.

His phone rang and I sighed.

"I don't think it's in the cards for me." I said and he pulled back, pure unadulterated disappointment on his face.

"Hello?" He asked roughly.

"Oh, hey mami." His voice softened and I smiled, my hand trailing up to his shoulder.

"Just studying at Milton's." He said and I rubbed my thumb over his chest. He glared at me.

"Mami, can you just take her with you?" He said and I sighed.

"Fine, Yeah, I'm on my way." He said and I went to grab my shirt. He held it farther away from me and shook his head.

"Alright, love you, be there soon." He said before hanging up.

"I gotta go take care of Lily. Mom's going out." He said and I sighed.

"I guess we should get dressed." I said and he shook his head.

"I still have ten minutes." He said leaning down to kiss my neck.

"Jer, you have to go, besides, I can't send you home, like that." I said and he groaned.

"Fine, but this weekend, you and me, we're going on a trip. Just us alright?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah… okay." I said and he leaned down to kiss me again.

"I'll see you later." I whispered, pulling away. He had to go.

I got out of the car and kissed him again before going inside.

"Where's Jerry?" My mom asked as I walked into the house and I sighed.

"His mom needed him to babysit Lily." I said and before going to my room.

I dropped my backpack down before booting up my laptop and logging into Skype.

"Hey Milt." Kim said, her head buried in a textbook.

"Hey, am I interrupting something?" I asked and she shrugged.

"No, just getting some reading done. What's going on?" She asked and I sighed.

"You and Jack have had sex before right?" I asked and she rolled her eyes.

"You know we have Milton. Why are you asking?" She asked and I looked down at my fingers.

"What was it like?" I asked.

"I thought you said you never wanted to know. I distinctly remember you pushing me off the bed and hitting me with pillows until I stopped talking." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Now I wanna know." I said stubbornly.

"Is that a hickey, Milton?" She asked and my hand dropped to my neck before I stood up and went to the mirror.

I had two bruises on my neck, one at the base of my throat, and one under my ear.

"I'm going to kill him." I said and she laughed.

"So that's why you want to know about sex." She said and I blushed before dropping back in front of her.

"No, I just, I wanted to know." I said and she sighed.

"Well, it was good I guess, kind of short." She said and I laughed.

"Don't laugh. You wouldn't last long either. Besides, he got much better." She said and I gagged.

"Yep, I don't wanna know." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"You asked, now you're going to hear about it."

"Can't we change the topic. I'm going on a trip with Jerry this weekend." I said, trying to distract her.

"Oh… is Jack going too?" She asked.

"No. Thank God." I said and she smirked.

"What if he wants to…" She said and I blushed, looking down.  
"I don't know." I said and she leaned towards the computer screen.

"Do you want to?" She asked and I rolled my eyes.

"So bad." I said and she raised her eyebrows.

"But…" She asked.

"But… I don't know. Do you think it's too early?" I asked and she rolled her eyes.

"Milton, you two have known each other for like ever… besides, it's not like he's going to think you're a slut and leave you. If you're not sure, then maybe that's a sign." She said and I shook my head.

"But I am sure. I do want to. I want to lick his abs." I said and she sighed.

"OK, overshare much. Just be safe loser." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Okay mom." I said and she waved before hanging up.

I scratched at the scarf that was wrapped around my neck as I stood at my locker.

"Nice scarf loser." Some girl said and I rolled my eyes. I couldn't take it off.

Jerry added a new hickey once he saw what he'd done.

"Ignore them." Jerry said and I leaned against my locker, scratching at my cast.

There was no exaggeration, those things really do itch.

"That's easy for you to say, you don't have one." I said and he pinched my side.

"Sorry I'm so good with my mouth. It's a blessing and a curse." He said and my face reddened. I punched him in the shoulder before heading off to class.

"Does Jerry have a girlfriend?" I heard a girl ask and I looked back at her.

"Yeah, he's seeing someone. I hear the person he's seeing is like super attractive and they like each other a lot." I said, my face reddening.

I'm shameless.

"Like that's ever stopped him before." She said.

"What do you mean?" I asked and she looked at me as if she were asking why I was still talking to her.

"Well, Jerry's not really a one woman man. I don't know a girl he hasn't cheated on. Jerry Martinez gets around." She said.

"Like for real. I heard that one night he made out with Grace, then went on a date with Lindsey. Apparently Lindsey gave him head and he never called her back." Another girl added.

"Well, who said that?" I asked and they turned to give me identical looks, much similar to the one the first girl gave me.

"Everybody, jeez, he's _your_ best friend. You should know. Why are you so concerned anyway?" She asked and my face got impossibly redder.

"Just hadn't heard that one yet." I said and she turned back to her friend, going on to talk about Jerry's conquests.

"I'm so excited for tomorrow." Jerry said as he turned towards me, his hand falling on my hip.

"Me too." I said and he went to kiss me.

I pulled away, and he groaned before scooting closer, his mouth falling on my neck as his hand drifted up my shirt.

"Wait." I said, pushing his head away and he sat up.

"What's wrong?" He asked and I sat up too.

"Nothing, let's talk, I just wanna talk." I said and he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Okay… what do you want to talk about?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Ooh, I know. How far have you gone?" I asked and he raised his eyebrow.

"Why?"

"I just want to know."

"Not all the way." He said and I nodded.

"So how far is that?" I asked,

"Why do you care Milton?" He asked and I shrugged.

"I think it'd be fair to know." I said and he sighed.

"Why does it matter?" He asked.

"It matters because I want to know." I said.

"Why do you want to know?" He asked, running his hands through his hair.

"because, I want to. Now tell me." I said and he sighed.

"I've gone down on a couple of girls." He said and I played with my finger.

"How many?" I asked.

"What?"

"How many girls is a couple, like, two, three, or the whole cheer team?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"The whole cheer team? What kind of guy do you think I am?" He asked.

"I don't know. Girls talk Jerry." I said and he sighed.

"Yeah, too damn much." He said.

"Is it true? Did you like it, do you still, like, do it?" I asked and he scrubbed his hands over my face.

"What the hell is this about Milton?" He asked.

"Don't curse at me. I just think it's important to know where you've been. "

"Look Milton. I don't know what this is about. Why are you coming at me with all this?" He asked.

"I think I should know what you expect from me before we go…"

"So this is about tomorrow. Look Milton. If that's the way you feel, we can never even touch each other again. I don't know what has gotten into you, but I at least thought you'd be smart enough to ignore the shit they say about me. I don't expect anything from you." He said, his voice deadly before grabbing his backpack.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Home." He spat out and I scrambled out of bed.

"Wait, don't go. I didn't mean-" I began.

"You didn't mean to call me a slut? Gee, thanks." He said and I sighed.

"You're being stupid." I said and he froze.

"What?"

"I didn't mean it like that. Jerry I'm sorry. Please don't leave." I said and he sighed, dropping his backpack.

"You're being so idiotic right now Milton." He said and I ran my hand through my hair."I'm sorry, I guess… You have so much experience and I've never…" I began and he rolled his eyes.

"You're an idiot. It doesn't matter. Besides, I've never done half of what people at school have said. And newsflash, you're the first guy I've been with. I'm just as inexperienced as you are." He said and I put my head on his shoulder.

"Don't be mad at me." I said and he sighed before grabbing my hands.

"I'm not. Just… talk to me before you go all Sherlock Holmes on me." He said and I nodded.

"Are we still going tomorrow?" I asked.

"Yeah." He said and I nodded.

"Could we maybe… you know tomorrow?" I asked, burying my head in his shoulder.

"Could we what?" He asked and I knocked his side with my broken hand.  
"You know…" I said, my face reddening.

"What? I don't speak awkward toddler." He said and I punched him.

"I was going to ask if we could maybe take it to the next level, but you're a jerk." I said and he wrapped his arms around my middle before nudging my head up.

"Only if you want to. You don't have to, there's no obligation. We don't do anything you don't want to." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I know." I said before pulling him back towards the bed.

"Not tonight, I gotta go." He said and I groaned.

"You always have to go." I complained and he leaned down.

"I know… I'm sorry." He whispered before kissing me.


	11. Chapter 11

I looked over at Jerry. His hair was flying in the wind and he had one hand on the wheel.

Which I would completely scold him for about his unsafe driving practices, but I really couldn't complain.

His other hand rested on my bare thigh.

He was rubbing his hand up and down slowly while he conversed about everything from the beach to his recent A on another quiz.

I was surprised because when we were together, we did not do all that much studying.

A heavily syncopated beat came on and he turned it up all the way.

"I love this song." He said and I rolled my eyes, tucking one of my legs under the other, causing his hand to shift up.

"I keep it 300 like the romans, 300 bitches where the Trojans." He sang and I looked over at him.

"What?" I asked.

"It's Yeezus." He said and I shook my head.

"That's not what I'm concerned about. Did he just say he keeps it 300 hundred, like the romans?" I asked and he nodded.

"Yeah, clever right?" He asked and I laughed.

"it's incorrect, and it's pretty gay." I said.

"What?" He asked.

"It's gay." I said simply and he rolled his eyes.  
"How?" He asked and I ran my hands through my hair.

"Well, the 300 army was an incredible _Grecian _army."

"Yeah, and..."

"Who fought so well because they were lovers, and they fought for each other to keep their lovers alive. So, the Trojans you need are for the 300 hundred gay men he's having sex with." I said and he laughed before leaning over to me.

"Well." He said, kissing me.

I pushed him away.

"We're going to crash, idiot." I said and he rolled his eyes.

I heard honking and I looked behind us to see who it was who we had cut off.

They had a pride flag waving out the window.

"I guess where we go, the gay follows." I said and they drove up beside of us. I grabbed Jerry's free hand and waved our intertwined hands towards them. They all cheered and I smiled before looking over at Jerry.

He was smiling.

Not smirking.

But full out smiling.

"What are you smiling about?" I asked and he shrugged.

"It's just nice." He said before turning the station.

We got to the beach and he grabbed my hand.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Holding your hand." He said. And I looked around.

"But, I thought you said that you wanted to keep it a secret." I said and he let my hand go before wrapping his hands around me from behind.

He tried to put his head on my shoulder and I laughed.

"You're a little too short to do that." I said and he grabbed my hand.

"Shut up bean pole. Besides, I dunno, outside of Seaford it feels different. I feel like I don't have to hide." He said and I turned around and kissed him.

"You're so cute shorty." I said and he bit my lip.

"At least I make up for my height in other places." He said seductively.

"Yeah, like those two dinner plates on the side of your head." I said, flicking his ear softly to hide my flustering.

"uh-huh. Don't act like you don't love these." He said and I smiled.

"I do." I said. He slipped his hands in my back pocket and pulled me closer.

"There's a difference between PDA and scaring little children." I said and he squeezed my butt.

"Do you mind?" He asked and I shook my head.

"On second thought, not really." I said and he laughed before letting me go.

"Come on, let's go get something to eat." He said and I nodded before following him to a small restaurant.

We laid in the sand, his sweatshirt wrapped around my frame as I leaned into him.

There had been a party going on the beach. Someone even lit a bonfire. I let him pull me into his side as he kissed me softly.

Vaguely I could hear someone cheering us on.

Teenagers were weird.

"it's getting cold, do you want to head back?" He asked and I nodded.

We walked up to the car and he drove to a little motel.

He'd rented a room.

"I'm going to shower okay?" I asked as we walked into the room.

"Yeah cool." He said and I went to the bathroom with my suitcase.

On top of my underwear and some condoms and lube that my mother insisted I take and watched me pack, was a small bottle of alcohol.

I stole it from my dad's cabinet.

I know how bad that was, I mean, I was under aged. But really, I was scared. I was so scared. I knew how porn made gay sex look, and I knew the basic mechanics I could look up online. Apparently it doesn't feel too good the first time for the bottom.

And Kim was right, I was the bottom in this relationship.

I took a big gulp and choked on it.

"Milton, you alright?" I heard Jerry ask.

"Yeah, choked myself brushing my teeth." I yelled back before realizing how ridiculous that sounded.

I couldn't even pleasure a toothbrush.

I took another gulp and willed myself not to choke.

I took several more sips before putting it up and getting in the shower.

I stepped out, after thoroughly washing.

Like almost invasive.

I stared at my naked frame in the mirror before pulling on my pajamas. I should give Jerry some time to shower too.

He went in after me and I sat on the bed.

I really don't get what everyone said about this stuff.

It wasn't really doing anything.

I laid next to Jerry on the bed, my heart beating out of my chest. He grabbed my hand.

"Calm down." He said and I nodded.

"Let's build a fort." He said and I got out of the bed with him. I stumbled a little and giggled.

"You okay?" He asked and I nodded.

He stripped the bed and pulled the arm chairs over.

"Come on." He said and I grabbed the blankets, pulling the sheets over the chair tops. He grabbed the pillows, he's requested extra pillows, which I read helped during anal sex, and piled them under the canopy of sheets.

"Come on." He said, turning down the lights. I followed him into the fort and straddled his body.

He kissed me and my head started spinning.

I swayed slightly.

"Are you okay?" He asked and I nodded.

"Fine." I said and he went back to kissing me slowly.

I moved my hips on top of his and he stilled them.  
"Are you sure?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yep. I'm great. Let's do this." I said, trying not to slur my voice.

"Okay." He said. He rolled over on top of me before climbing out of the fort.

"Where are you going?" I asked, following him. He stood up and turned towards me. He kissed me and grabbed my butt. I groaned and he lifted me. I wrapped my legs around him as he walked towards the bed. He dropped me on the bed and I banged my head on the headboard.

"Shit." I swore and his face twisted in worry.

"I'm sorry, are you okay?" He asked and I nodded before pulling him towards me. He landed on my arm and I yelped.

"Sorry." He said and I shook my hand out.

"I'm fine." I said. He began to kiss me and pulled off my shirt. I did the same and he reached for my pants.

"You're not wearing any underwear." He said and I sat up.

"Oops." I said coyly and he groaned.

"You're killing me." He groaned and I tried to flip onto him.

"Watch your elbow." He said as my elbow hit his ear.

"Sorry." I said as ground down on him eagerly and sloppily.

"Are you sure?" He asked and I nodded.

My vision was starting to blur.

He gripped my hips, pulling my pants down past my thighs, his thumb swiping my hipbones and I groaned.

"Feels good?" He asked and I shook my head.

"what's wrong?" He asked and I leaned over, puking on the floor.

Now I see what everyone was talking about.

"Are you okay?" He asked, rubbing my back.

I feel bad for the cleaning lady.

"Yeah, sorry." I said, spitting out strings of vomit.

"It's fine. Milton, you really shouldn't have drank that much. You're a lightweight." He said.

"You knew?" I asked as I pulled up my pants.

"Yeah, the bathroom reeks of alcohol man. If you weren't ready, you could have told me instead of getting wasted." He said and I sighed, running my hands through my hair.

"I was ready. I'm just nervous." I said and he shook his head.

"You shouldn't be. Come on, let's get you to the bathroom while I clean this up." He said and I nodded as my stomach rolled.

We didn't have sex that night.

Not even a handy.

Instead I fell asleep with my head in the toilet while he scrubbed the carpet.


	12. Chapter 12

I woke up the next morning, the sun coming in through the window and I groaned. I clamped my eyes shut and snuggled into Jerry.

He was the big spoon.

"Morning Milton." Jerry murmured and I turned over to look at him.

"'morning." I murmured and he moved some hair out of my face.

"I'll get you some aspirin." He said before getting out of bed.

"Here, we'll get dressed and then head out." He said as he handed me the pill bottle and a bottle of water.

I sat in the car, my head on the window. His hand was on my thigh, but he was really quiet. I was wearing a pair of his sunglasses as I tried to get over my first and last hangover.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked quietly and he sighed.

"No." He said and I sighed.

"Promise?" I asked and he was quiet for a moment as we switched lanes.

"Yeah." He said and I leaned back over to get closer to him.

"I'll see you later." He said, kissing me as I leaned in the front door of my house. I wrapped my hands around his neck and tried to pull him closer.

"I'll see you later." He said as he pulled away and I nodded before stepping back.

"See you." I said with a wave and he nodded before going back to his car.

I ran upstairs and dropped on my bed. I grabbed my laptop and turned it on before skyping Kim.

"Hey Babycakes… how'd operation deflower little red go?" She said coyly and I groaned.

"It didn't." I said.

"Why? What happened? I thought you said it was definitely going to happen." She said and I shook my head.

"I puked on the carpet." I said.

"What did you eat?" She asked.

"A fifth of vodka. Okay, so like 1/3 of a fifth of vodka. The bottle was half empty and I spit up some of it." I said and she rolled her eyes.

"Why the hell would you do that?" she asked.

"Because, I heard that alcohol can loosen your body so that the first time wouldn't hurt so much… and I was kind of nervous." I said and she sighed.

"If you weren't ready Milton, you could have told him that." She said and I sighed.

"I was ready, at least… I thought I was… but then we went back to the room and it was happening and I didn't know what to do." I said.

"Well, what did Jerry say?" She asked.

"He just cleaned up my puke and put me to bed. Told me that if I wasn't ready, I could have told him. He said he wasn't mad, but I don't believe him. Jerry may be a good liar, but never to me. Not the important things." I said and she sighed.

"Why would he be mad at you? I mean, all you did was get drunk off your ass. I mean should he be mad just because you had to get drunk to have sex with him." She said my eyebrows furrowed.

"Oh my god, I did that. Oh my god, I'm a terrible person." I said.

"Uh, you think?" She said I sighed.

"He probably felt like he wasn't good enough. Jerry may act all tough, but I can guarantee if there is one thing he hates besides being called stupid, it's not being good enough." She said and my face dropped.

"I'm a terrible boyfriend." I said as I ran my hands through my hair.

"A little. But you don't know any better." She said and I nodded.

"How do you know?" I asked.

"Because, you're as painfully virginal as it ge-"

"No, not that. How did you know that you wanted to be with Jack?" I asked and she leaned her chin on her hand.

"Well, I was nervous, but I wasn't frightened. It was like the butterflies that you get right before a match. But not like one where you're going up against the biggest brick house they could find. Like a nice match that you are confident you could whoop ass in. I was in the bathroom and I just looked In the mirror and said to myself 'Would you want him to be the father of your child' when the answer was yes, I knew. I wouldn't do it if I didn't trust him completely with the life of our unborn fictional child." She said and I groaned.

"That's easy for you to say. I can't just say, 'Do I want Jerry to be the father of my kid'. I don't have a uterus to carry our fictional kid." I said and she groaned.

"If I were there, I would punch you in the forehead. I don't plan to just have Jack's baby any day now. I'm just saying, when you think about it, would it scare you to know that this person could be the one thing that could wreck your dreams? Are you okay with them changing your whole life? When the answer is yes, that's when you do it. Don't do it because you're super horny. Do it when you are ready." She said and I sighed.

"But I want to do it now." I pouted and she rolled his eyes.

"Instead of bitching to me, why don't you just talk to him about it?" She asked and I nodded.

I really needed to talk to him.

"Fine. I will." I said before hanging up on her.

We sat in his car before school.

Why would we go in?

"Jerry?" I asked meekly and he looked over at me.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"I'm sorry I ruined the weekend." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"You didn't ruin it. I didn't take you up there for sex. I just wanted a day where you were only mine." I said and I picked at my cast.  
"I know… but, I just want you to know, I didn't get drunk because I couldn't bear to have sex with you because that is definitely not the case. I just got scared and thought if I drank, it would help."

"I know, but Milton, you realize sex isn't the end all be all right? There are things we could do in place of sex until we are ready to take it to that level." He said, grabbing my hand.

"Really?" I asked and he nodded.

"Yep. We could touch each other for starters." He said, his hand trailing down my chest.

"I could give you a handjob." He said, his hand resting over the button on my khaki shorts.

"Or, I could blow you." He said and I whined.

"Not before school Jerry." I said and he laughed.

"We could make it quick." He said, nodding towards the backseat.

"No." I said, pushing him.

"Come here." He said, pulling me into the front seat with him as he began to kiss me.

His mouth slipped down to my neck and I groaned as he gave me a hickey.

"I'm going to kill you." I said into his hair.

There was no real promise to that threat.

"Come on, we've got to get to class." He said, his voice deeper and I punched him in the arm.

"I hate you so much." I said and I sat back down in the passenger seat to calm myself down.

"Here." Jerry said and I looked over at him to see him holding out one of his necklaces.

"What's that?" I asked and he shrugged.

"Just a chain." He said, and I took it.

"Thanks." I said and he shrugged.

"No problem. Come on, we've got to get to class." He said and I nodded before putting the necklace on. I tucked it under my sweater before going to class.

I sat down with my lunch and Jack sat down in front of us.

"So, Prom's coming up." Jack said raising his eyebrow and Jerry bit into his half of my sandwich.

"Yeah and?" I asked and he shrugged.

"So… I want to know if Jerry's going to be bringing the mysterious girl that everyone's talking about?" Jack asked.

"What girl?" He asked and I looked down at the table.

"You know, the super attractive person that you are totally happy with. Or is that over?" Jack asked.

"Where'd you hear that?" I asked and Jack rolled his eyes.

"Around. Just wondering what kind of friend doesn't tell their friend who their dating." Jack said and Jerry rolled his eyes.

"Rumors Jack… rumors." Jerry said and he rolled his eyes.

"Whatever."

"Hey, did you hear that they're going to do away with pizza day?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

It worked.

"Alright, who is she?" I looked up from the grapes I had been sharing with Jerry.

"Who's who?" I asked and Jack rolled his eyes.

"Who's the girl who's making you crazy?" Jack asked.

"Uh, I don't think I'm acting crazy." I said, looking over at Jerry.

"Am I acting Crazy?" I asked Jerry and he shook his head before putting a grape in his mouth.

"Not you Milton. When it comes to girls, it will never be you." He said and I sneered but went back to my grapes.

"Who's the girl Jerry? I know it's someone. I'm not stupid. You've been acting crazy lately. You've been ditching me, your grades have been better, when you are with me, you're on your phone. You disappeared a whole weekend without even texting me. Who is it? I know you're seeing someone." He said and Jerry rolled his eyes.

"I'm not seeing a girl Jack, leave it alone." Jerry said.

"No! I gotta know. We're boys Jerry, you're supposed to tell me everything. Who is it? Who are you into Why are you hiding it?"

"I'm not into anyone. There is no one that I like, for fuck's sake." He said and I took a deep breath. My chest felt constricted. I stood up, wiping at my face.

"Shit, Milt." I heard Jerry say and I crossed my arms as I stormed off.

"Wait, will you stop walking awa- stop!" Jerry yelled and I stilled.

"What?" I asked.

"What's wrong?" He asked and I scoffed.

"Like you don't know. Then again, whatever, it's not like you were just hanging out with me for a month. Jeez, I'm glad I didn't have sex with you." I said and he grabbed my arm.

"Will you keep it down?" He shushed me and I rolled my eyes.

"Sorry Jerry, sorry I thought we were more than just… what exactly were we?" I asked and he sighed, scrubbing over his face.

"I was just saying that shit because Jack kept badgering me."

"You don't say things that you don't mean." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Milton, I lie all the time." He said and I shook my head.

"Not to your friends, not to me. Not about something important." I said softly and he looked around before grabbing my hands.

"Milton, I like you. I really do. I… I just can't tell him." Jerry said and someone cleared their throat. He paled, snatching away from me and I sighed.

"You're a fucking idiot Jerry." Jack said.

"Actually, you both are." He said.

"What are you talking about?" Jerry asked.

"You two are obviously together."

"N-no… us-?" Jerry began.

"Shut up Jerry before you say something really stupid. It's freaking obvious you two are together. I don't know why you didn't tell me before. Like seriously, I'm your best friend." Jack said and I crossed my arms.

"I know." Was all Jerry could say.

"And as your best friend, you should know that I wouldn't give two shits who you're fucking. I don't care. I am actually so happy you two pulled your heads out of your asses, I just wish you would have told me." He said.

"I just… I'm not ready." Jerry said and I swallowed.

"I know, it's fine, I'm not going to announce it to the world or anything. It'd just be easier if you had told me sooner. Think about all the things I could have covered you for." He said.

"Not to mention, all the dates you've ruined" I said under my breath and Jack smiled.

"Oh that? That was payback. Like I've said before, there are brains under all this pretty." He said and I scowled.

"I knew it. I told Kim-"

"You told Kim before you told me?" He asked, indignant.

"We should probably go talk it out." I said, and Jack glared at me.

"You guys suck." He said.

"Well…" I said and he plugged his ears before storming off.

Jerry was quiet, his face stony.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked and he sighed, rubbing his hands through his hair.

"Yeah, I'm okay." He said and I sighed.  
"It's a good thing Jack knows. We don't have to hide as much." I said and he just shrugged.

Something sank to the bottom of my stomach.

Maybe it was actually bothering me that he cared that Jack knew.


	13. Chapter 13

the spanish  
Get your cute ass over here loser.

Chapter Text

I sat on my bed opposite Jerry as I looked over his textbook.

"Alright, that should be good." He said and closed the textbook.

"Are you sure? We could go over the industrial revolution." I said and he rolled his eyes before grabbing my shoulders.

"conseguir su culo lindo aqui perdedor." He whispered before pulling me into him. He began to kiss me and I pushed at him before falling into his lap.

He sat back against my headboard and cradled me to his chest as he kissed me. He held onto my hips and I wrapped my arms around his neck. My cast thumped against the headboard and he pulled back to look over at my arm.

"Your hand okay?" He whispered and I nodded.

"I get my cast off in a week. So you know, I won't have to wear it at prom." I said and he kissed me harder.

He gripped my hips tight and began to roll his hips up to meet mine. I groaned and he leaned down to kiss at my neck while mumbling something in Spanish.

I could feel my skin begin to heat up as my heart jack rabbited in my chest. He ran one hand across my cheek as he leaned his forehead against mine.

"Jerr- I'm… i- I'm" I stuttered out and he pulled me closer to him. My hips stuttered to a halt as my orgasm washed over me. I closed my eyes, my cheeks heating up and Jerry's hips slowed down.

"Sorry." I whispered and he leaned up, kissing me on the cheek.

"No big deal." He said and I leaned my head against his shoulder.

"Just give me a minute." I said, waiting for my heart to slow down.

"Take your time." He said with a smirk and I groaned, punching him in the chest.

"Shut up." I said, once my breath wasn't coming out in pants.

"Do you want me to uh…" I began and he shook his head.

"I'm good, how are you feeling?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Dizzy, overwhelmed, sticky." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to shower?" He asked.

"Together?" I asked, my eyebrow raised.

"No, your parents are here." He said and I shrugged.

"And your point is?" I asked. He pushed me off of his lap and I landed onto the bed with a bounce.

"I'm going to shower… Stay for dinner?" I asked softly and he looked down at his watch.

"Uh yeah… sure." He said. I grabbed some sweats and went to shower.

I'd be so glad when I didn't need to wrap a bag around my arm to shower.

I ran a towel over my head as I walked into the room.  
"Hey, what are you doing?" I asked and he turned to face me, holding a stuffed rabbit.

"You still have Rondell?" He asked and I blushed.

"Sometimes I still can't sleep." I said, pulling the stuffed animal away. He tilted another animal, my parents insisted I keep all my childhood plush animals, to see a small bracelet.

"What's that?" He asked and I blushed.

"It's nothing." I said and he picked it up.

"I gave this to you when we were way younger." He said and I shrugged.

"Yeah, I'm a complete hoarder." I said and he scratched at the little carving I had made into my toy chest.

J+M

"Julie?" He asked and I blushed.

"Me?" He asked and I nodded.

"Duh." I said, trying to hide my face. He rolled his eyes but collapsed onto my bed, pulling me with him.

He wrapped his arms around me, tucking his head into my shoulder.

"Sorry Milt, I can't come over today." Jerry said as he leaned against the locker the next morning.

"Oh… okay, why not?" I asked.

"I have to babysit Lily." He said and I nodded.

"But you have a big test coming up soon. Are you ready?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I guess that doesn't matter does it." He said and I tapped my hands against my forearm.

"Maybe I can come over and help you." I said and he shrugged.

"I guess so." He said and I nodded.

It had been a long time since we'd hung out at his house.

We stopped at Lily's school and picked her up before taking her home.

"Alright, upstairs squirt." He said to her as they walked into the house.

"What? That's not fair." She said and he shrugged.

"I don't care, I'm in charge, go upstairs." He said and she huffed, but stomped upstairs.

"That wasn't nice. Why didn't we just go to your room and let her have downstairs." I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"Because she's annoying and she would have destroyed something. Then my parents would kill me. I'd rather that didn't happen." He said before collapsing onto the couch.

I heard her rattle something off at him in Spanish.

"uh-huh, let mami hear you say that." He yelled back.

I'm guessing she said something very inappropriate.

"Let's just start studying." He said and I nodded.

"Alright, so, World War Two. It started in 1939, because of Hitler's great ambitions to gain territory, starting with Austria." I began as I pull open the text book.

I leaned over Jerry's book to point at one of the questions on his study guide when my forehead bumped his cheek. He looked over at me with a smirk and leaned forward, connecting our lips. I sighed and leaned into the kiss.

"Jerry… I'm hun-" We looked back to see Lily standing behind us.

"Shit." Jerry said, scooting away from me on the couch.

"What are you two doing?" She asked and I ran my hands over my burning cheek.

"What are you doing downstairs? Didn't I tell you to stay upstairs." He said to her.

"Because I'm hungry. Why are you kissing Milton?" She asked and he clenched his jaw.

"I- I uh." He began.

"It's a thing that friends do. You kiss your friends don't you?" I asked and Jerry looked over at me.

"Not on the lips. That's weird." She said.

"Uh yeah, which is why you shouldn't do it. Alright." Jerry said.

"I'll ask dad about it, see what he has to say about boys kissing." She said and Jerry's face paled.

"What do you want?" He asked.

"I think I want twenty bucks." She said and he dug into his pocket before pulling out the bill.

His gas money for the week.

"Take it. Just please, lily, don't tell dad, please." He said and she nodded.

"Okay." She said before skipping into the kitchen. Jerry ran his hands through his hair before scooting to the edge of the couch.

"We should get back to work." He said and I nodded before looking down.

We studied until his parents came home and he drove me back to my house. He didn't kiss me before I got out of the car, just whispered an 'I'll call you later'.


	14. Chapter 14

I got into his car the next day, my fingers thrumming against my backpack.

"Hey." He said, leaning over and kissing me on the cheek.

"We okay?" I asked and he nodded.

"So, I uh… I heard about this movie that's coming out this weekend, do you want to go see it?" I asked and he hunched his shoulders.

"I can't." He said softly.

"Oh, uh… maybe we can just hang out at my place." I said and he shook his head.

"I can't hang out with you this weekend." He said and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Oh… okay." I whispered.

It wasn't, he couldn't hang out this weekend, it was, He can't hang out with _Me_.

Well that felt a lot worse than I thought it would.

"I'll see you next class." He said and I nodded as I walked into my classroom. I sighed and played with my phone before asking my teacher could I leave class.

He waved me off and I made my way into the bathroom before calling Kim.

"Hey, what's up Loser?" She answered the phone cheekily and I took a deep breath.

"If a guy says 'I can't hang out with you this weekend' should I be worried?" I asked and she sighed.

"What happened. You didn't have another mini freakout and ask him about his sexual history did you?" She asked.

"No… Lily saw us kissing." I said and she tsked.

"Well, shit." Kim said and I took a deep breath to stabilize my fast beating heart.

"Maybe he's grounded." She said and I shook my head.

"I don't think so; he normally prefaces it with 'I'm grounded'. What should I do?" I asked and she sighed.

"Just, don't freak out. It could be a family thing. Just let him talk to you about it." She said and I nodded.

"And whatever you do, do not make a scene about it. Please." She said and I nodded.

"Alright, okay, thanks for the advice." I said.

"No problem. Now, get to class." She said and I hung up before heading back to class.

"Milton…" Jerry grabbed my arm and pulled me into an alcove.

"Yeah?" I asked, looking around.

"I can't hang out with you this weekend." He said and I nodded.

"I know." I said and he sighed.

"I can't because I have a date." He said and my heart thumped unevenly.

"Oh… is she pretty?" I asked, trying to sound nonchalant about it and he pushed my shoulder.

"It's not like that." He said and I shrugged.

"Well, you normally only date pretty girls, I just wanted to know." I said softly.

"I didn't ask her out. My mom did. My parents have noticed that I haven't had any girlfriends in a while. So my dad thought it would be a great idea to hook me up with the girl from church." He said and I clenched my jaw.

"Why didn't you tell them you were seeing someone?" I asked and he glared at me.

"Because you're the person I'm seeing. They've noticed how much time we've been spending together." He said and I shrugged.

"Well great." I said.

"It's not like it is with your family. I don't have these great white parents that'll support me like that. I have my parents, and my parents don't play with this kinda stuff." He said and I nodded.

"Oh, I thought this was about our relationship. Sorry, I forgot." I said and he rolled his eyes.  
"Don't be like that." He said and I sighed.

"Whatever, I hope you and church girl have a good, sanctified time. I've got class." I said and he sighed.

"Milton, please don't be like that." He said and I smiled at him.

"Be like what?" I asked and he sighed but followed me to class.

I looked up from my book to see Sydney sitting alone. I got up and went over to him.

"Hey Sidney." I said and he looked up at me before looking around.

"What are you doing?" He asked and I furrowed my brow.

"I'm saying hey to my friend. Why didn't you answer my call yesterday?" I asked and he looked down.

"Look Milt-"

"What's going on Sidney? You haven't talked to me since I broke my hand." I said, looking down at the cast. I noticed a bruise on his arm.

"What happened to your arm Sidney?" I asked softly.

"Milton, I really don't think this is a good idea. I've gotta go." He said, picking up his stuff.

"Wait, where are you going?" I asked and he shook his head and kept walking.

"Hey, Why are you sitting over here?" He asked and I stood up.

"No reason." I said softly before going to the table.

"What's wrong?" Jerry asked as he sat beside of me and I shook my head.

I tapped my fingers against my book as I tried to put together an answer key for Jerry's study guide.

"I just don't get it." I said and he looked over at me.

"You don't get World War Two?" He asked and I rolled my eyes.

Our study dates have been strictly study dates since Lily walked in on us. Not to mention he had a second date with church girl.

"No. I don't get why Sidney won't talk to me. What did I do?" I asked and he snorted.

"Sidney's a loser." He said and I rolled my eyes again.

"Yeah, but so am I. It's just weird. Ever since flint beat me up, it's like he won't look at me." I said, tapping my pencil against the textbook.

"Well, he has no right to look at you, the way he left you there to get beat up by those _culeros_." He said.

"Yeah, but why isn't he talking to me. We're nerds, we get beat up and we run." I said.

"Because, I told him not to." He said before highlighting something.

"What?" I asked.

"I told him to stay away from you. He just let you get beat up like that. He should be the one with the broken hand, not you." He said simply.

"Why would you do that?" I asked.

"Because he bailed on you." He said and I slammed my book closed.

"So because Sidney ran, he's not worthy to be my friend. Why are you dictating who I get to be friends with?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"Please Milton, don't start." He said and I scoffed.

"What? Me don't start? So you can go out with anyone you want, and you can take girls out but I have to stay inside like a dirty little secret. I can't hang out with anyone else huh? Maybe I'd like to go out with someone who actually wants to be seen with me in public." I said and he scrubbed his hands over his face.

"You're blowing this way out of proportion alright? He left you. He's nothing." He said.

"God, you sound like Flint. You're the one who gave Sidney that bruise on his arm didn't you. Of course you did." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"He fell into a locker. It wasn't my fault."

"Just like I slammed my hand in a locker, over and over and fucking over again?" I asked and he shook his head.

"It's nothing like that." I said

"I'm nothing, right Jerry? I don't matter, and I can't make my own decisions. I can't be seen in public with you because you're afraid of your father and your stupid religion. I'm not important. I'm just a secret. A shameful secret." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Well if that's the case, why don't you just go hang out with him? And when Flint tries to kick your ass again, we'll see where he'll be."

"Maybe I will." I said, taking the necklace Jerry gave me off and throwing it at him.

"If you want him, you can have him. Have fucking fun." He said, grabbing his stuff and cramming it in his backpack.

He slammed my door and I groaned before pressing the heel of my palms into my eyelids.

"Kim?" I whispered into my receiver.

"Hello?" She whispered, her voice groggy.

"I think me and Jerry just broke up." I whimpered, trying to keep myself from crying.


	15. Chapter 15

I took a deep breath as I stood at my locker. I looked down at my watch and looked down the hall. Jerry wasn't coming. I made my way to my first period and sat down in my chair, slinging my backpack down.

He didn't come to any of my classes and as I stood outside of gym class, my stomach knotted up. I'd have to see him this period.

He didn't talk to me all class, electing to hang out with Randy instead of me. I put my head in my hands as I waited for the class to end.

I stared at our lunch table as I looked around the cafeteria. I could go over there and sit down as usual, but I didn't want to. I didn't want to sit down next to Jerry and pretend that nothing happened, that I wasn't royally pissed about how he treated Sidney.

So I didn't.

I sat down at Sidney's table and he startled.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he scrambled to pick up his things.

"Please…" I yelled and he stopped moving.

"Just… please don't leave me." I said and he sat down cautiously.

"What's wrong Milton?" He asked, looking behind me, probably looking to see if he was any danger from Jerry.

"Me and Jerry br-" I stopped myself. I couldn't tell Sidney, even if Jerry and I weren't…. whatever Jerry thought we were… anymore.

"We got into a fight." I said softly and Sidney sighed.

"Over what?" He asked and I looked up at him.

"Oh, right, the whole threatening me thing." He said and I nodded.

"I'm sorry he did that." I said and Sidney shrugged.

"It makes sense. I left you alone and Flint tried to kill you. I would want to kick my ass too." Sidney said and I shook my head.

"That's not the point. Jerry shouldn't dictate who I can and can't be friends with. He can't isolate me from my friends and then keep me locked away like a cheap toy." I said with a rush of anger before looking up at Sidney slowly.

"So, that's really why you guys are fighting. Because he won't come out?" Sidney asked and I shook my head.

"No. Jerry's not gay alright." I said and he tsked before grabbing my hand.

"Milton, I'm gay, obviously, and so are you and that's okay, I won't judge you. You're right; you shouldn't have to hide your love. However, this is High school. It's not as easy for some people. It won't be easy for us, not as long as we're in this hellhole. Some people are closed minded, and some people are afraid of their feelings. So, maybe he'll come around or maybe not. But he definitely won't if you try to force it out of him. No one wants to be forced out of the closet, no matter how dark and dank it may be." He said before looking behind me. I turned around to see Jerry stand up and leave the cafeteria in a huff.

"It's clear he loves you though. He just needs time." Sidney said before dropping my hand.

I stood outside of Sidney's locker the next day as he pulled his books out of his locker. It was the end of the day, and I had yet to talk to Jerry.

If he needed time, I'd give him all the time in the world.

"So, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to hang out tonight. Go see a movie?" I asked and he pulled his astronomy book into his arm.

"That's sweet, honestly. But I can't do that. Unless it's strictly platonic. I'm not going to be a rebound for you." He said and I sighed.

"I just figured, I mean, we're both… you know." I said awkwardly and he turned towards me.

"Yeah, but I'm not at all your type and you know it. And no offense, but you're not even a little bit my type. Besides, I have someone else in mind." He said, looking back as Jack leaned against the locker opposite his.

"Gross Sid, come on. That'll never happen. Besides he's still head over heels for Kim." I said and he shrugged.

"The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"That's never going to happen, I'm telling you." I said and he closed his locker and leaned his back against it.

"You never know." He said and I pushed away from the locker.

"Whatever, I'm going to go call my mom for a ride. I'll see you tomorrow." I said and he nodded.

I made my way to my locker and began to grab my book when I was pushed into my locker. I turned quickly and my back was pushed into my locker, the lock digging into my back.

"Where's your little lap dog, Martinez?" Flint asked and I tried to push away from him.

"Leave me alone." I said, and he pushed me back into the locker.

"No. You're a little piece of shit. You're nothing and you have the nerve to pretend you are something." He said pushing me again.

"Now Martinez isn't here to fight your battles. It's just you and me. And this time I intend to finish what I began." He said before grabbing my hand and forcing it above my head.

"You see, you don't understand… You cost me everything. I'm being held back because of you. And I'm done." He said and I took a deep breath.

He punched me in the mouth and I gasped. His next hit was to my stomach and I doubled over in pain.

"You are nothing. You are disgusting. You are nothing but a disgusting." He banged my injured hand against the locker

"worthless." He did it again.

"Weak" again.

"Useless." Again.

"Fag." He said, smacking my arm against the edge of my locker and I screamed.

"Shut up!" He yelled and I groaned.

"I'm sorry." I whispered and he nodded.

"Not as sorry as you'll be." He said pinning my other hand above my head. He held both of my wrists in one hand.

"You just don't listen." I heard Jerry say and Flint let me go.

"Get the fuck out of here, before I do more than give you a concussion." Jerry threatened and Flint looked at him, disdain in his eyes.

"Go!" He yelled and Flint fled.

"Milton, are you okay?" Jerry asked, grabbing my jaw and turning my head.

"Leave me alone." I said, pushing away from him.

"Come on, I'll drive you home. Come on." He said, pulling me to his car. I curled myself up into his passenger seat as we drove in silence.

"Milton… I knew he was going to pull some crap like that." Jerry said and I kicked his dashboard.

"Milton, what are you doing?" I continued to kick at his dashboard and he grabbed at my legs.

"Stop that." He said and I got out of the truck, slamming the door. I pounded up my stairs and threw opened my door.

I grabbed my stuffed animals and began to throw them, before ripping off my bed spread and kicking at the frame. I slammed the side of my cast against the wall before I put my foot through my mirror.

"Whoa… whoa." Jerry said, grabbing me around my waist and I tried to fight him.

"Let me go! Let me go!" I struggled in his arms.

"I can't stand it. I'm so weak and messed up and no one wants me." I before taking a deep breath as a wave of emotion hit me.

"I'm just a disgusting, worthless, weak, useless faggot." I whimpered and Jerry shushed me.

"No… That's not true." Jerry whispered.  
"No, it is. I'm so afraid all the time and I'm angry at myself because I'm weak enough to feel this afraid. Flint took everything from me and I can't do it. I can't do this anymore. I can't." My voice broke.

"I'm not good enough. I'll never be good enough." I whimpered through a sob and Jerry shook his head.

"No, you're good enough. You're great Milton. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry I made you feel this way. You're fucking perfect." He whispered as he stroked my hair.

"You're so beautiful." He whispered and I hiccupped as he tightened his grip on me.

"Can we please stop fighting. I miss you." I whispered into his hair and he nodded.

"I miss you too." He whispered before kissing my chin. He chuckled into my chest before trailing his fingers down my arms to intertwine our hands.

I hissed and he pulled my hand up.

"Damn it." He said, looking down at my hand.

"What, it just stings." I said and he cursed under his breath.

"Yeah, because it's swollen and purple. You broke your fucking cast." He said and I swallowed.  
"We have to go to the hospital then?" I said and he nodded.

"Come on." He said, guiding me to the car.

By the time we hit the first stoplight, the pain kicked in.

I stared down at my newly casted hand with a sigh. I was supposed to be getting it off in a couple of days… but now, I'd have to wear it during prom.

"Ready to go home?" He asked and I nodded. My head was still fuzzy from the medicine that they gave me and I wanted nothing more than to go home and sleep it off.

Jerry led me upstairs to my room before going to my bed; he made it up quickly before cleaning up the glass and putting my stuffed animals back.

"Come on, let's get you to bed." He said, helping me into the sheets.

"Stay?" I whispered and he looked back at my door before nodding.

"Yeah, I'll stay." He said before getting into bed with me. He pulled me into him and I rested my head on his shoulder.

I bit at his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" He asked and I pulled away from him, putting my hand on my hip.

"We should do stuff." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Milton, you're fucked up right now. I'm not doing "stuff" with you." He said and I sighed.

"But Jer… We're alone, and half naked." I said pointing down at my boxer clad legs. He placed his hands on my hip and pulled me into him before kissing me slowly.

I pulled him even closer, my eyes drifting closed immediately as he nipped at my lips.

Then everything went black.


	16. Chapter 16

I awoke to my arm throbbing and Jerry staring at me. He was propped on his elbow, his other hand tracing the reinstated necklace around my neck.

"I fell asleep on you huh?" I asked and he shrugged,

"It's cool, how are you feeling?" He asked and I sighed.

"My arm hurts a little, I think I got it a little worse than last time." I said and he grabbed my fingers gently.

"You sprained your wrist and you jostled your fingers pretty bad. They say it'll be at least two more weeks before you can get this one off." He said and I sighed.

"Well, that's great." I said, flopping back against the bed.

"Can we talk?" He asked and I sat up again.

"Yeah, sure." I whispered and he sighed.

"I'm sorry for all that Sidney junk, and just all the shit that happened between us." He said before running his hands through his hair.

"I want this… I want us alright. I can't… I can't promise that I'll be out there you know? I can't promise that I'll tell my parents or anything… but I'll try, I'll try. I broke up with Karen last night. I won't go out with anyone when I have you alright." He said and I nodded, our hands intertwined.

I tucked myself under his arm as we stood at the airport. Jack was beside of us, his arms crossed.

"You two are disgusting." He said and I sneered at him.

"You'll be the same once Kim gets in." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Kim and I are nothing like that. We're chill." He said and Jerry pulled me closer to him.

Everything had been going well since that morning. Sure he hadn't told his parents yet, but I told myself I wasn't going to rush him. I did that last time and it screwed me over. I was going to just wait for him to do it. Ultimately, Sidney was right, if I forced him to come out, he'd resent me.

"Jack!" I looked up to see Kim barreling down the hallway, her bags rolling after her.

"Kim" He breathed before meeting her halfway, picking her up and swinging her in a circle. She dropped her bags and he kissed her deeply.

"And we're disgusting." I said under my breath and Jerry hip checked me.

I cleared my throat and they stopped kissing, but Jack continued to hold her.

"What about your best friend?" I asked and she wrung loose from Jack softly before hugging me.

"That's all I get? No, go back to the top of the hallway and run to me." I said, shaking her off.

"Don't be a jerk. Come on, hug me Milly." She said and I gave in, squeezing her tightly.

"And there goes my back. Thanks." She said snidely.

"You're welcome." I said with a sarcastic smile.

"Sup' Kim." Jerry said, hugging her.

"Hey Jer. You two worked everything out?" She said and he grabbed my hand gently.

"Yeah, we're taking it, one step at a time." He said softly and she smiled.

"That's so cute guys. Come on, I wanna get home before my parents and surprise them." She said and I nodded before heading towards the exit.

"So… prom is coming up." I said and Jerry rolled his eyes.

"Yeah and?" He asked.

"I was just wondering what we were doing that night." I said and he put down his book.

"We're going, duh." He said and I smiled.

"Really?" I asked and he nodded.

"Are we going together… or _together_?" I asked and he took a deep breath.

"We're going together." He said, holding both tickets out to me.

I grabbed the tickets and put it on the bed gently before kissing him softly. I leaned back onto the bed and he followed, lying on top of me.

I ran my hands through his hair and he let his thumb trace my jawline softly while his other hand gripped my hip. His hand travelled up the bottom of my shirt and I groaned under him.

"Wait, save something for prom night." I said, pushing him up slightly and he hovered over me.

"Really?" He asked.

"Yeah. If that's okay with you." I said, my face pink.

"You don't have to… Just because I bought the tickets doesn't mean I expect that." He said and I shrugged.

"It's what people do." I said softly.

"Not if they're not ready."

"Well, I will be." I said and he smirked, dropping down to kiss my nose.

"How cliché." He said and I closed my eyes.

"Shut up. And get off of me, I told Kim we'd meet her to go Prom dress… attire shopping." I said and he rolled off of me. I got off the bed, going to slip my shoes on.  
"What if I would have said we weren't going?" He asked, stretching back onto my bed.

"I have ways to convince you." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Oh do you?" He asked.

"Yep, I would have convinced you with my womanly wiles. I would have showed a little leg… maybe flashed an ankle, who knows how crazy I would have gotten… I might even have showed you a shoulder." I said and he smirked.

"Oh a shoulder… that's just too much, how can I control myself?" He said sarcastically and I pulled down my shirt slightly, exposing my freckled shoulder.

"Oh god, it's too sexy, I can't control myself." He said, grabbing me and pulling me back onto the bed. He wrestled with me before landing on top of me.

"You've gotten yourself in this mess; it's all your fault." He said putting his lips into the crook of my neck.

"You were asking for it." He said and I grinned against his hair.

"Wow, rape fantasy." I said and he bit my shoulder.

"Ow." I whimpered and he nuzzled against my shoulder.

"Sorry. Can't control myself." He whispered and I pushed at him.

"We've got to go." I said and he rolled his eyes but rolled off of me.

I looked at the purple bowtie that matched my cast and Jerry wrapped his arms around me.

We were outside of Seaford, and he was more comfortable touching me.

We were taking it one step at a time, but there was only so much progress he could make.

"Yeah?" I asked and he nodded.

"It'll look good on you." He said and I bit my lip.

"Really?" I asked and he nodded.

"And I'll wear purple too, we'll match." He said, grabbing a purple tie and slinging it over his shoulder.

"Okay," I said with a smile.

"Guys, we're shopping on the pier, can we go to the boardwalk?" Kim asked, pointing to the small amusement park set up.

"Yeah, why not." I said and Jerry grabbed my hand before heading towards the rides.

We made our way through the park, going on most of the rides until it got dark.

I leaned my head on his as we waited for some cotton candy. The man handed it to us and Jerry paid before leaning up and kissing me. I pulled away, my face red and he smiled softly before squeezing my hand.

"Come on guys, it's getting late." Kim shouted and I turned to follow her to the car, Jerry's hand intertwined in mine.

It was a nice feeling.


	17. Chapter 17

"Alright, we'll see you Monday alright?" My mom said as my dad hauled the last of his science equipment to the car. He had a lecture this weekend and my mom elected to go with him. Normally he'd ask me, but I guess he and mom wanted alone time.

"Okay." I said.

"There's money for food on the fridge, make sure you lock the doors, no parties."

I outright scoffed on that.

"And Jerry can stay the night; just make sure you don't tear up the house." She said and I rolled my eyes.

"Mom, I'll be fine. Have fun with Dad." I said, hugging her.

"Alright, we love you honey." She said, kissing my forehead. My dad patted me on the back.

"Don't forget about the pamphlets." My mom said and I groaned.

"Please leave." I said, practically pushing her out the door.

"Have fun, but not too much!" My mom yelled as she got in the car and I rolled my eyes.

"What's that? Want me to drink all the vodka in the house while I dance around in my underwear, got it." I said.

"Whatever makes you feel sexy!" She yelled back as they sped away and I clenched my jaw.

She still got me.

I debated actually making good on that promise but decided against it when I remembered what happened last time I drank.

Instead I queued up Netflix for a Friday night solo movie night. Jerry was stuck at home with the family, and Jack and Kim were probably holed up in some room making poor decisions.

My phone began to ring and I grabbed it.

"Hey." I said with a smile.

"Hey." Jerry whispered back and I tucked my feet under me.

We continued to talk while an episode of Sherlock played.

To be honest, I couldn't even concentrate on it.

"My parents left for the weekend, so I've got the whole house to myself." I said.

"I wish I were there." He said back, his voice slightly deeper.

"Oh really, What would you do?" I asked coyly. I'd never taken the plunge into phone sex, but with Jerry, I was willing to try.

"Well, i- shit." I heard him curse.

"what's wrong?" I asked.

"My dad's calling me." He said and I sighed.

"Dang it." I said.

"I'll call you right back alright?" He said and I sighed.

"Alright, talk to you soon." I said and he hung up. I sat my phone down and thrummed my fingers together, the episode had ended and another was half over. I turned off Netflix and went upstairs to take a shower.

He hadn't even texted me.

I found myself back on the couch, thumbing through the channels when my phone rang.

"Oh thank god you're back. Let me tell you, I showered, everywhere." I said seductively.

"Milt?" I heard Jerry whisper into the phone.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Can you pick me up? I'm on Trade Street, I got kicked out." He said, his voice breaking.

"Yeah, alright, here I come." I said, grabbing my jacket and my dad's keys.

I took a deep breath as I walked out of my door. It was an outrageous downpour, the rain seemingly flying in sideways. I swore under my breath.

Jerry would be standing in this weather.

"Hey, try and get out of the rain." I said into the receiver before opening the garage door. He mumbled something noncommittal as I put the top up before making my way to Trade Street. The streets were deserted and I debated speeding through a couple of red lights.

"Hey, I'm here," I said as I pulled up to see Jerry huddled under a tree. His shirt was clinging to him and his hair was plastered to his head. I ended the call.  
"Hey, come on." I yelled, reaching into the backseat for an umbrella. His hands were crossed over his chest and he was huddled over as if her were trying to make himself small as possible.

"Hey, what happened?" I asked and he just shook his head.

"Come on, let's get you back to mine." I said, pulling him to the mustang. We rode in silence until we got to my house. I led him to the living room and turned on the light.

His face was bruised, his lip busted and he had a cut above his eye.

"What happened to your face?" I asked, gripping his chin gently.

He tried to turn his head and I applied more pressure so that he would look at me.

"Talk to me Jer, what happened?" I asked and he sighed.

"There was a news piece about the pier being a big attraction to gay people. They shot it the night we were there." He said and I shook my head.

"So… what does that mean?" I asked.

"So, so my dad saw you and me kiss on TV. They taped us, It was on Univision. All the Spanish speaking people in Seaford will know. My dad was so angry, so mad that everyone he knows will know how much of a disgusting fag his son is." He bit out and I pulled him closer to me.

"That's not true. Jerry, you're not disgusting. This… how we feel isn't disgusting. It's real and it's important." I breathed and he shook his head. I pulled back, dabbing at his bloody lip with the bottom of my shirt.

"We got into a fight because I told him about us. I told him that I loved you. He got so mad; he lost it. He just kept shouting, saying horrible things and hitting me and I tried to get him to stop, I did, but he wouldn't. My mother got between us and he told me to leave. I didn't have time to grab my keys… I just ran." He said, his voice breaking and I gripped his hand.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that happened." I said before standing up.

I'll go grab my first aid kit alright?" I asked and he nodded. I left the living room and came back quickly with the kit and a couple of towels.

"Here, let me." I said, dabbing at his eye with a cotton ball. I put a butterfly band-aid over it before prodding his abdomen. Nothing seemed broken, just bruised.

"Did you really mean it?" I asked, looking down as I began to pack away the first aid kit.

"Mean what?" He asked.

"That you loved me?" I asked, afraid to look into his eyes. After all that, I couldn't expect that he meant it. It could have been all in the heat of the moment. He pulled my chin up before crushing his lips to mine. I laid back on the couch and he ran his hand up my side.

"Is this okay?" He asked and I nodded. He pulled back a little before pulling me off the couch and around his waist. He carried me upstairs and dropped me on my bed. I pulled my soaked shirt off and he did the same before unbuckling his pants.

"Still okay?" He asked and I nodded, reaching under my bed for 'the box'. I knew what Kim meant. I wasn't as afraid, I wasn't even thinking about me at this point.

He kissed down my back as I threw the condoms and lube back to him before pulling down my pajama pants. He opened me shakily, his breaths shallow before slowly entering me. I hissed and he kissed my shoulder.

I took a deep breath as I felt my shoulder wetten as his thrusts became erratic.

He was crying.

I've never seen Jerry cry.

"I'm gay. I'm fucking gay." He whimpered before his body tensed up and his hips stilled. He took a couple of shallow breaths before he pulled out of me and I turned around, wrapping my arms around him as he cried into my shoulder.

He fell asleep like that.


	18. Chapter 18

"Hey," I blinked my eyes opened and adjusted my pillow, Jerry was staring at me, his fist shoved under his head.

"Hey." He said again, his voice rough from crying.

"Hey Jer. How are you doing?" I asked and he shrugged,

"I don't know." He whispered and I scooted closer, intertwining our fingers.

"How are you feeling… about us?" I asked and he sighed.

"That I want there to still be an us. That I love you. My parents be damned." He said and I nodded.

"I want there to be an us too. I'm sorry about your parents… But we'll figure it out alright?" I said and he nodded.

"I love you." I whispered and he squeezed my hand.

"I love you too." He said back softly.

"I'm sorry about that." He said and I furrowed my eyebrow.

"Sorry about what?" I asked back.

"Sorry that I cried during our first time. Sorry I took your first time away from you." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"You didn't take anything from it. It was perfect. Really, I imagined that there were going to be tears my first time. So I was prepared for someone to cry." I said and he punched me in the shoulder lightly.

"You didn't even get to… you know." He said, looking everywhere but at me.

"It's okay. I'm sure I'll get a chance soon." I said and he leaned closer to me.

"Yeah, just probably not tonight." He said with a yawn.

"Boys, always falling asleep after sex." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"You're a boy too idiot, and besides, I didn't think we had sex. You know…" He said, playing with my fingers.

"Yeah. We made love, and just saying it sounds just gross and old." I said and he punched me softly again before settling on the pillow. His eyelids were drooping and I could tell he needed sleep.

He fell asleep softly and I watched as his face softened.

I awoke to an empty bed and I sat up. I grabbed a pair of underwear and slid them up my legs before grabbing a hoodie and throwing it on. I made my way downstairs cautiously.

"Jerry?" I asked as I made my way into the kitchen. He was standing at the stove.

"Are you okay?" I asked and he turned towards me, the redness from last night had turned into dark bruises.

"Yeah, just got hungry." He said, pulling some toast out of the toaster.

"And here I thought my boyfriend was making me breakfast." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"I only know how to make toast… so you're on your own." He said and I rolled my eyes before pulling some grapes out of the fridge.

"Wanna go eat on the couch?" I asked and he shrugged, before following me.

I curled my feet under his and he sighed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Sore." I said, stretching my back. "Although, I think that's what supposed to happen."

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" he asked and I shook my head.

"I'm fine. How are you feeling?" I asked and he laid his head back on the couch.

"Well, my dad hit me... and my parents kicked me out so…" He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I feel numb." He said and I leaned against his chest,

"Well, I'm here… and you can stay here as long as you want." I whispered into his chest and he sighed.

"You know, when I thought of being kicked out, I always imagined that it'd be because I knocked some girl up." He said with a hollow laugh and I pushed his chest.

"You're going to be okay… Now, we've got the whole place to ourselves for two more days… Let's not waste it." I said and he raised his eyebrow.

"What do you have in mind?" He asked and I shrugged.

"You'll see." I said before pulling him on top of me.

We ordered takeout and marathoned Law and Order: SVU until we feel asleep, empty Styrofoam trays scattered on my bed.

It was like old times, not that I wasn't happy I was dating Jerry, it just felt good to know that we'd still be friends even if we were 'more than friends.'

We spent the rest of the weekend in our own little oasis, killing time watching TV and making out. It was nice having no expectations.

I was selfish, because it was nice that Jerry didn't have to go home. I was happy he got kicked out, because he could be with me.

He was with me and I'd never get over hearing him whisper that he loves me.

I cuddled into his side as he dominated me at Mario Kart.

"This is nice." I whispered. Falling off Rainbow Road yet again.

He put the controller down and kissed me, pushing me back onto the bed.

My breath hitched and he trailed a hand down my chest before kissing me on the nose.

"This is nice. I'm happy." He said softly.

"But you suck at video games." He whispered with a smirk before kissing my eyelids.

"Let's go to bed." He whispered, turning off the TV and lying back down beside me.

"Go to bed, or _go to bed_?" I asked and he hit me in the face with a pillow.

"Go to bed." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"I love you." He whispered and I smiled.

"I love you too beautiful boy." I whispered, wiping my thumb across his cheek and he blushed before burying his head into my neck.

"Milton honey!" I heard my parents call and I looked over at my alarm clock.

It was six in the morning.

I sat up, trying to detangle myself from Jerry.

"Where are you going?" He asked and I ran my injured hands through my hair.

"Downstairs." I said and he shook head.

"Just stay for a little while." He groaned, his hand finding mine in the dark.

"Milton honey, we just got back, and you have school." My mom said flipping on the light to find Jerry lying in bed with me.

"Oh… sorry." She exclaimed, going to turn off the light, but Jerry rolled over, squinting into the light.

"Jerry, what happened to your face?" My dad asked, stepping into the room.

"It's nothing Mr. K." Jerry said, trying to get out of bed.

"It is a big deal." He insisted.

"I got kicked out." He answered and my mother's face scrunched out.

"Why?" She asked and he looked over at me.

"And your father did this?" My dad asked, I could see the wheels turning in his head. He'd want to press charges, put Mr. Martinez in jail.

Which I believed he'd have every right.

Jerry wouldn't agree as much.

"He didn't mean to. We both said a lot of things and the fight got a little physical. He's never done that before." Jerry said and my mom tsked.

"Honey, you can stay here as long as you want to. There is nothing wrong about you and who you love, you know that?" She said, hugging Jerry tightly. She wiped her eyes and took a deep breath.

You have some clothes right?" she asked and he nodded.

"Good. School's soon. You two should get up." She said and I nodded. They left the room, conversing quietly.

"You're parents are amazing." He whispered.

"Like all parents should be. There's nothing wrong with us." I said he smiled.

"Yeah, except your morning breath." He said and I thumped him against the head with my cast and he fell off the bed.

"I'm going to remember that." He promised and I rolled my eyes.

"Just go brush your teeth, dork." I said and he got up, jogging to the bathroom. I began to make up my bed when I heard a knock on my door.

"Hey." I said, turning to see my mother leaning in the doorframe.

"So… Did it happen?" She asked and I looked down with a blush.

"Oh it did, how was it?" She asked and I bit my lip.

"Wet?" I said and she scrunched up her nose.

"Did you want it? Did you like it?" She asked and I nodded to both.

"Good. Did you use protection?" She asked and I nodded.

"I'm happy for you. Now, go get dressed." She said and I shook my head, heading for the bathroom.

I all at once loved and hated my 'cool mom'.

I drove us to school, since Jerry didn't have the car, even though my dad threatened me with eternal isolation and punishment if I brought her back with even a scratch on her. He grabbed my backpack, shouldering it, since he didn't have his, and walked me to my locker.

"Hey guys!" Jack said and I smirked.

"I'm surprised you're even here, since Kim's in town." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"My parents wouldn't let me take the day off to spend with her." He said with a pout, running his hands though his hair.

"Jerry, what happened to your face?" Jack asked and he shrugged.

"A disagreement about my lifestyle." He said before grabbing my hand and squeezing it gently. Jack raised his eyebrow at our linked hands but just nodded.

"I've got class, see you at lunch." He said, walking off, his phone vibrating as I guess Kim texted him.

"Is this alright?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, it's fine… but why?" I asked.

"Because, it doesn't matter what anyone tells my mom, and what's anyone going to do to me? They saw what I did to Flint. No one's going to fuck with us for dating." He said before knocking his shoulder into mine.

"Besides, I want everyone to know that you're mine." He said and I smiled with a blush.

He stopped in front of my classroom and grabbed both of my hands.

"See you next class period." He said before leaning in and taking a deep breath. He kissed me and I felt like I was losing my breath.

He pulled back and I could hear people gasping.

"Here." He put the backpack on my shoulders and straightened it before lightly punching my chin.

"Go, before you make me late." He said, pushing me into the classroom. I heard everyone's chatter but I didn't care.

By lunch the news had spread to the whole school. No one said anything adverse to my face.

I only got disappointed remarks from a couple of girls that thought they had a chance with Jerry.

I know, being out has made me a sassy little bitch.

Then again, I've always been a sassy little bitch.

"Boyfriend." Jerry said, sidling up to me.

"Boyfriend." I said back, bumping hips with him.

"Novio." He countered, wrapping his arms around my shoulders.

"Novio, buy me some ice cream." I said and he rolled his eyes, but pulled his wallet out.

"Are we going to turn into Jack and Kim?" He asked and I blew out a breath.

"We're already worse than them. By a long shot." I said and he nodded.

"True." He said before heading to the cashier.


	19. Chapter 19

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I asked as we pulled up to his house. He shook his head and took a deep breath as he began to unbuckle his seatbelt.

"I need my clothes, and my car. This is the only time _He_ won't be home." He grimaced before opening the door.

"I'll come with you." I said and he smiled softly.

"Come on." He whispered before getting out of the car.

He used the key that was given to me to open the door before stepping in cautiously.

He went upstairs, grabbing his backpack, stuffing it with clothes and other necessities before grabbing his car keys and stuffing them into his back pocket.

"Jerry?" I heard his mother call and he shouldered his backpack before heading downstairs.

"You're back?" She asked and he shook his head.

"I can't stay here with him ma, I can't." He said, shaking his head softly.

"He didn't mean it. I promise. He was taken by surprise, and-" She began and he held his hand up.

"No, he meant it when he put his fist through my mouth. It shouldn't matter who I love. Especially when they're good for me. " He said, grabbing my hand. I blushed, leaning my head against his shoulder.

"Can I ask you something?" Jerry asked softly and she nodded.

"Did you know… about me and Milton?" He asked and she nodded.

"Of course. You two were always so close and a mother always knows." She said softly.

"Your father may not be okay with it, but we'll get there, I promise."

"Well, when he does. You know where I'll be." He said, adjusting the backpack on his back before pulling me towards the door.

"Take care of Jerry for me sweetheart." She said after me and Jerry pulled me to the mustang before leaving to get into his car.

He followed me back to the house and got out of the car.

"Jerr-"

He grabbed me into a hug and I let myself be squeezed tight. He took a couple of deep breaths and I closed my eyes.

"Are you okay?" I asked and he nodded.

"I think so." He whispered before letting go.

"I love you." I whispered and he leaned his forehead against mine.

"I love you too." He whispered back before completely recoiling from me.

"Let's go put this stuff away."

He laid on my bed and I piled in at the end of my bed, the history book I'd been using to help him study placed in my lap.

"So, finals are in two weeks." I whispered and he shrugged.

"Prom's this weekend." He answered, running a highlighter over the page.

"Do you still want to go?" I asked softly and he looked up at me.

"Of course I want to go. I paid fifty dollars a-piece for those tickets." He answered and I smiled.

"Good, I want to go too. Can you believe that in three weeks we'll be seniors?" I asked and he shrugged.

"Yeah, if I ace this final." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"You'll ace this, just watch."

"Not if I keep getting distracted by my boyfriend." He said fondly and I punched his shoulder.

"Well I'll leave and you can study."

"Shut up." He said, grabbing my leg to keep me from moving. His thumb swiped over my ankle bone lovingly and I sighed.

"Get to studying." I said before his phone rang.

He looked at it before sitting it back down.

"Who is it?" I asked and he sighed.

"The house phone." He answered simply.

"Are you going to answer?" I asked and he shook his head.

The phone stopped ringing and he went back to the page before it buzzed to life again.

"Jerry answer the phone." I commanded and he took a deep breath.

"I need to study." He said and I grabbed the phone.

"If you don't answer, I will." I said and he reached to grab the phone.

"I don't want to talk to anyone in that house." He whispered and I pushed him.

"Come on, just answer the damn phone." I said and he snatched it from me before pressing call.

"Jerry?" I heard Lily's voice whisper, her voice shaking.

He rattled something off in Spanish.

"Lily what's wrong?" He asked, already sliding into his shoes, his school books forgotten on the bed.

"Mama… papi…fighting." I could only pick out a couple of her words across the grainy connection. I could faintly hear the arguing in the background.

"I'll be there in a little bit. You stay on the phone. Alright?" He asked softly and he grabbed his keys.

"Wait." I said, slipping into my own shoes.

"What are you doing?" He asked and I grabbed my house key.

"I'm coming with you."

We pulled into his driveway and I could hear the loud Spanish coming from the house.

He unlocked the door and stepped in.

"Jerry!" Lily exclaimed, her arms tucked around his torso tightly.

He whispered something in Spanish, petting her head and I stood by the door, feeling utterly useless.

"How long have they been fighting?" he asked.

"For a couple of days. This has been the worse." She whispered into his chest.

"Did he hit her?" Jerry asked and I furrowed my eyebrows.

Was that a thing that happened a lot around here?  
I heard someone come barreling down the stairs and I pressed myself against the wall to keep from being seen. Jerry pushed Lily behind him.

"Jerry." His mother stopped to look at him and I saw his father's face turn in contempt.

"What are you doing here? I told you, you weren't welcome here, _joto_." His father spat and Jerry flinched softly.

"I can't believe you have the nerve to come back here." His father spat with even more venom and Jerry stepped back.

"And you. You did this to him!" He yelled, turning his attention to me.

"Shut up!" His mother yelled and he turned back to face her.

"You can't believe that Milton did anything to him." His mother argued.

"No, he turned my son into a mamón. He tempted him, tricked him. Jerry wasn't like this until he met that marica. It's all his fault."

"Don't call him that." Jerry said and his father turned to glare at him.

"He's not a bruja, or a demon. He's a boy. A boy who fell in love with another boy. It's not the end of the world." His mother said.

"It's sick and I won't stand here and listen to you condone such an abomination."

"Then don't! Don't do this Robert. Don't make me choose between my son and you. You won't like it." His mom hissed and he looked at her, enraged.

"You would choose that-"

"I would choose my son over you yes. He loves Milton, and that's a lot more than I could say about you Robert. So you accept it, or you leave. I made a promise to myself when I had him that I would never choose a man over my kids." She said forcefully and he grabbed his jacket.

"I'd rather leave."

"Then get the fuck out. And don't even dream of coming back. Go on! Go!" She yelled and he muttered something in Spanish before slamming the door behind him.

"Ma." Jerry whispered and she hugged him to his chest.

"I meant it. I'm so sorry I let him hit you." She whispered, running her hands over his fading bruises.

"I thought-"

"I don't agree with him. I was trying to stop him, and by the time I could you had ran out. I didn't… I'm sorry." She said softly and he took a deep breath before stepping back and grabbing my hand. I flushed but let him drag me to stand in front of her.

"This doesn't bother you?" he asked and she shook her head.

"I prefer him to every other girl you've tried to bring here, that Taylor girl… don't even get me started. Him, I like him." She said before wiping her eyes.

"I've got to go clean things up. You can come home whenever you want." She said and he nodded.

"I've got to go take Milton home." He said and she nodded.

"I'll see you tonight then." She said and he shrugged.

We left the house and he drove me home.

"I'm sorry about your dad." I whispered and he shrugged before leaning into me.

"I'm fine with it. My mom's fine with it." He said and I stroked my thumb over his finger.

"I just hate that it had to come to this." I whispered and he turned to look at me.

"I'd rather it come to this than leave Lily and my mom like that." He said.

"Now, let's stop moping around so I can get my stuff together." He whispered.

"Or, you could stay here for tonight, and we could do a little something as a going away present." I said, laying back on my bed. He shook his head at me.

"You're parents are here." He said and I shrugged, unbuttoning my buttons on my shirt with my non-injured hand.

"You don't care?" He asked, climbing onto the bed and I shook my head.

"Jesus Christ, I'm corrupting you." He said, crawling over me and taking off his shirt.

He kissed me and I pulled him on top of me.

He pulled away and I moved to kissing down his chest.

"Wait wait." He said, stopping me and I pulled away to look at him.

"Why?" I asked, and he ran his thumb over my cheek.

"Because, I want to save something for prom." He said and I raised my eyebrow.

"How cliché." I joked and he pushed me into the bed.

"But I mean. We already did it, so we really don't have to wait." I said and he rolled off of me.

"we had a minor setback in a major operation. Besides, there are other things I want to do." He said, running his hand down my thigh and wrapping my leg around his waist.

"Like what?" I asked and he pecked my lips.

"What we haven't done. I want to touch you. Put my mouth on you." He whispered before recoiling from me.

"You can't just say that and then leave me here." I said and he shrugged.

"It's a school night, Milton. I've got to get some rest so I can perform in school." He said and I huffed.

"You could perform right here." I said and he laughed.

"I've really corrupted you." He said before kissing me on the head.

"Now, I've got to go. We don't want to fall into a complacency. I've got to keep it spicy." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"You'll pick me up tomorrow morning?" I asked and he nodded.

"I'll see you in the morning." He said, kissing me on the nose before leaving.


	20. Chapter 20

I bit my thumbnail, looking down at myself.

"Jesus Milton, this was supposed to be about me. If I wanted another neurotic girl questioning her looks, I would have called Grace." Kim said and I stuck my tongue out at her before smoothing my hands down my front.

"You look like you contoured a beard on." I said, watching her crowd around the mirror.

"No I don't, do I really?" She asked, scrubbing at her chin.

I heard the doorbell ring and I looked down at my watch.

"Is that them? Already?" I asked and she sighed.

"It can't be; I look hideous." She said and I shook my head.

"You look fine Kim." I said and she groaned.

"I don't." She turned to look at me and the doorbell rang again.

"Come on, let's go." I said before heading downstairs.

"Wow Kim." Jack breathed and I took a deep breath before stepping onto the first floor landing.

"What do you think?" I asked and Jerry smiled.

"You look good. Really good." He said and I blushed.

"Well, come on, we don't have time to stand around. We've got a prom to go to." Kim said and we headed out to our cars.

"Come on." He said, helping me into the car.

We went to a fancy restaurant that he must have been saving up for months before heading to the hotel prom was being held at.

"Are you ready?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, are you?" I asked and he grabbed my hand, squeezing my hand.

"Come on let's go." He said before pulling me onto the dance floor.

We were pulled into the fray of flailing limbs and finding bodies.

The song ended and he disappeared from my side.

He came back as a slow song came on.

"Selena?" I asked and he nodded.

"It's romantic." He said, hugging me close as he hummed the song softly.

"You're such a sap." I whispered and he began to sing in a croaky voice.

"I could fall, in love with you." He sang softly and I leaned my head on his.

"I love you." I whispered.

"I love you too." He whispered back.

"When did that happen?" I asked, nodding back to Sidney and Randy who were slow dancing.

It was a strange sight.

But I guess, it was probably as strange as me and Jerry to some people.

"After we came out and no one harassed us, Randy grew some balls and asked Sidney out." Jerry whispered and I smiled.

We were doing good.

The song ended and Jerry grabbed my hand.

"Come on, let's get out of here." He said, and I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Come on." He said, leading me out of the ballroom and into an elevator.

"Where are we going?" I asked and he brandished a key card.

"You got a room? What kind of boy do you think I am? Do you just expect me to have sex with you?" I joked and he pushed me against the elevator wall, kissing me hard. He gripped my arms tight and raised them above my head.

The elevator beeped and he moved away from me.

"Alright well, I guess I'll just go to bed." He said with a shrug as he walked out of the elevator and opened the door. I jumped on his back, making him crash onto the bed. He rolled over and kissed me on the nose before getting up.

"Go shower yeah?" He asked and I raised an eyebrow, but did as he said.

I looked in the mirror, thinking about how it was the last time I was in this situation. At least I didn't have any alcohol on me.

I came out, a robe wrapped around me.

"I don't have any clothes, Jerry." I said softly as I pulled the robe closer to my naked body.

"Don't worry about it." He yelled and I walked into the room.

There were candles everywhere.

"What is this?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I wanted to give you a redo. You messed up our first first time, and I messed up the next. I figure, we could make it special." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"It doesn't matter to me Jerry. What we had was great." I said and he pulled me to the bed.

"Come on, let me do this." He said and I sat down softly.

"Okay, let's do this then." I said and he pushed me back on the bed softly.

"You've no romantic bone in your body." He said before chuckling.

"Please don't say I'm about to have one. I can't do this if we're going to resort to crude humor." I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Hey, you knew what my humor was like before you entered this relationship." He said and I flicked him.

"Less talking please." I said and he flicked me back before kissing me. I leaned back against the bed and he crowded over me. I scratched at his shirt and he swatted at my hands.

"This is about you." He whispered.

"Well me wants you to take off your shirt." I said and he took off his shirt before opening my robe.

He kissed me softly before moving down my chest.

"What are you doing?" I asked and he stopped at my hip.

"I love you. So much." He whispered and I nodded.

"I love you too." I said and he put his mouth on me.

I pulled him up the bed afterwards and he put his head on my chest.

"Junior prom is over." I whispered and he nodded.

"Senior year is ahead of us." I said softly.

"Then college. You're going to leave me." Jerry said and I shook my head.

"No, I won't." I whispered and he nosed against my chest.

"I won't leave you. We'll be together." I whispered and he nodded.

Senior year was approaching fast. Who knew what would happen? The gang would be splitting up, going their separate ways. Everything could change. But, we had each other and that was all that mattered in this moment.


End file.
